From Another Perspective

Artemis: *dramatically clears throat* Frauleins and Frankensteins, if I may collect your attention, I will be your host for the remainder of this meme, you poor bastards. If you would ever-so-graciously/kindly direct your attention to me, we shall begin. *AHEM* "Choose 3 of your OCs. They can be from anything. Original stories, fanfic OCs, whatever. It doesn't matter. None of this matters." Ooo! So we can wreak aaaall the yummy-nummy havoc we want, and in the morning everything will be all better again! ... Until someone stumbles across the naughty photos that will inevitably end up posted on the interwe- Iiii meeeeean... Lawlwut? 8D?

Yami: *pointedly yanks the papers from Artemis's hands* Give me those.

Artemis: Aw- Heeeeeeeyyy... :c

Yami: You can sit and listen, because otherwise we will be here for the rest of the goddamned night and perhaps this only due to my being NORMAL, but I would rather appreciate it if you would let me all SLEEP for a change!

Artemis: Oooo, cranky Yamyam is cranky... *pause* But I can still take pictures, right? 8D

Yami: *grumpily stares at her for a moment; siiiiigh; snide, barely-tolerant half-smile* If you must.

Artemis: *throws hands in air* Yatta! *busies self with setting up video camera, making popcorn, amassing drinks, and building a massive couch-fort behind Yami's chair to watch the festivities from*

Yami: Moving on, then.

1. Rori O'Connor
2. Julian Redcliffe
3. Jason Riley

[1] Yami: Are you all paying attention? Wonderful. Let's be brisk about this and then perhaps no one will need to die. "Introduce yourselves. Are you related in any way, or do you have no idea who the hell each other is?" *stares, unimpressed* ... Is it absolutely imperative that we participate in this exercise of incompetence? *looks to Sniffles, who lurks in the background menacingly brandishing reputation-destroying literature; grimaces* ... Damn it all to hell. I knew I should have incinerated that monstrosity when I had the chance.

Rori: If you're quite through with your griping, darling...
Yami: I wasn't griping, just... Hurry it up, and let's get this farce over with.
Rori: *smirks and opens mouth only to be silenced by Julian's hand*
Julian: *smiles* I'm Julian Redcliffe, and the ever-so-charming and loquacious red-haired gentleman to my right is my partner, Rori, and sitting next to him is one of our wards, Jason.
Jason: *lazily slouched in chair; lifts hand in salutation* Yo.
Julian: Sufficed to say, we're not related. However, we do all share a residence – our irascible host and overzealous hostess included.

[2] Yami: And I still lament the untimely passing of my sanity. "Great, great." My sanity would beg to differ, you callous heathen. "So. Ever gotten a-" *pause* ... What kind of perverse societal reject asks this kind of question to complete strangers!?

(Artemis: Psst. The answer is 'blowjob.')

Julian: Have I ever gotten a- *blink blink* O-Oh. *blushes and smiles, peeking at Rori* Well... *flirtatiously trails a finger up Rori's thigh*
Rori: *smirks, purring low in his throat, and strokes a finger along Julian's jaw* That would be a very definite yes.
Jason: Save it for the after-party. Jesus. And, uh... *clears throat and fidgets* Yeah. That would be a yes from me, too.
Rori: Which is also, interestingly enough, the only sentiment he was capable of sharing last night whilst I- *gets an elbow in the gut and laughs*

[3] Yami: ... Thank you for sharing that with us, Rori. Now if you would please excuse me, I'm afraid I may have to revert to auto-pilot whilst I bleach that filth from my brain. "What do you like doing when no one else is looking?" *pause* If any of you have even a fragment of something that harbours a remote resemblance to dignity, you will keep this answer to yourselves. Please.

Jason: Wow and here I was thinking you were the only person in this crew that wasn't a total pervert. Way to surprise, Yamz. I, for one, will admit that I like eyeing the girls' more aesthetically pleasing assets. Perfectly normal.
Yami: And perfectly suitable for an uncouth cretin. *gets the finger*
Rori: I plot and scheme with conniving mad-scientist-like little giggles. Well, that, and I will admit that I tend to baby-talk the animals. Except the cats. *scowls* Ass-licking little cretins. Shed on all my clothes, scratch up my furniture, piss all over the carpet-
Jason: He wages war on the cats with dirt clods, water guns and water balloons. Typically from the roof or from the bushes around the house. Guerrilla warfare against cats.
Julian: Is that why they're always so filthy...? *turns a stern look to Rori, who plays innocent* Well, at any rate, on my own part... Hmm...
Rori: He practises his dancing. Nude. In spike heels. With a pole. *gets smacked and laughs* He's really quite good.
Jason: *wide-eyed stare while Julian blushes, clears throat, and fidgets*

[4] Yami: *stares for a moment at aforementioned vampire, completely deadpan save for a mild grimace, before simply looking down at the next question* "Have any secret shames that you'd like to indulge upon us today?" *turns a deadpan yet dreading stare to the interviewees*

Rori: I must confess – and it is both degrading and rather discomfiting to admit this aloud – but... I've not felt a desire to fondle myself in well over a century.
Jason: *gawks in stupefaction* How can you function, man!? *Artemis pops up behind Jason's chair holding a sign that reads, 'fondles frequently, and likes it, too'*
Julian: *picks at his fingers and turns completely red* I'd rather we just skip this one, if you'd please.

[5] Yami: Gladly. "Got any-" *reads* Oh for the love of... Who writes these things? (Artemis: "Got any ultra-quirky kinks?" 8D *sitting with a notepad and pencil ready, while Yami turns a suspicious glare on her*) It was you, wasn't it? *is impatiently shushed*

Rori: *thinks with chin in hand, absently tapping a finger against his lip* ... Does having an unhealthy fondness for sex machines and watching while one's lover is penetrated and ultimately driven mad with pleasure by said machines count as ultra-quirky?
Yami: No, that's just perverse.
Julian: W-well, I wouldn't call them ultra-quirky, per se, but... *blushes with a sheepish smile* One or two, perhaps. *peeks at Rori, who fires a wolfish smirk back and waggles brows*
Rori: He has several, in fact. All very naughty. Incomparably naughty, really. I believe several countries overseas have banned such acts, actually – probably a good handful of the states down south, too.
Julian: Rori-! *trying to shush him*
Jason and Yami: *both staring at the couple with alarmed grimaces*
Julian: *embarrassed laugh* He's exaggerating! All exaggerating!

[6] Yami: Never mind, I don't think I'll be sleeping tonight after all. "Within the last month, how many people have you done questionable acts with?"Why!? What is it about their endless debauchery that you find so impossibly fascinating!?

Rori: Too many, and yet not enough. I couldn't be bothered to count them all, but these two... *lays arms around Julian and Jason's shoulders, smirks* These two are absolute certainties.
Jason: *glare* I hope you choke on someone's cock and die.
Julian: *smiles bashfully and blushes*

[7] Yami: "Do you love me?" No, I find you disturbing, and disturbed, and- "I love you." I DON'T CARE. YOU FRIGHTEN THE TINY REMNANTS OF MY SANITY.

Jason: Yamz, you're gonna start hyperventilating again-
Yami: NO I'M NOT.
Julian: They're just cue cards, dear. It's not their fault.
Yami: YES IT IS.
Rori: Yami darling, why don't you temporarily postpone your duties as our host for a few moments, come with me, and I promise that I will make everything better in only the most thorough and utterly rapturous manner imaginable.
Yami: *pins Rori with a rabid stare, shoulders heaving, teeth bared, fists clenched and fingers clawed, before throwing the cards in the air and storming away swearing both incoherently and vehemently*
Artemis: *darts in, hopping, scrambling and plucking the cards up again* My turn! *crawls into Yami's chair and settles with her legs pulled to her chest*

[8] Artemis: AHE-HEM. "Are you hurt because I lied in that last question?" Aww, frowny-face. Yamyam did not approve.

Rori: No he most certainly did not. Pity. It's been a while since I've last bedded him.
Julian and Jason: *slow, pointed stare*

[9] Artemis: "If you could kill someone and get away with it, who would it be?" Oooo, naughty. *waits eagerly for answer* c:

Jason: Whoever wrote these questions.
Rori: My sire.
Julian: *slightly alarmed glance at the other two* I'm... not sure, to be honest.

[10] Artemis: "What is the one thing that sets you off so much that you'll go from docile to rabid squirrel monkey in 12 seconds?" *snerks* Hee. Rabid squirrel-monkey. CB

Rori: Seeing him - *nods to Julian* - in scanty patent leather briefs, spike heels, and slinking around all sexy-like.
Jason: I don't think that's what they meant.
Julian: Mm... *thinks* Ah. Yes. The Mayflowers. April Mayflower in particular.
Jason: The- Who?
Rori: Ugh, the pompous, condescending, homophobic-... *glowers at nothing*
Jason: ... I am so lost.

[11] Artemis: O.o ... That makes two of us. "Who the hell are you people? Why are you in my house? Are you even people? Get outta my stuff!" *gasp* For shame! D *whips out the Fire hose of Disapproval and blasts them with it*

Rori: *now sopping wet, while Julian hid behind him and Jason was blasted backwards out of his chair* T_T...

[12] Artemis: Well that's what happens to people who disrespect the privacy of others. *Jason barks a laugh of disbelief* AHEM. *continues like she never heard anything* "Does rain filter down through your handsome volcano rocks to create a wild mineral water that's tasty for the ladies?" Mmm, tasty!

Rori: *takes off shirt and leans back in chair all sexy-like with a smirk* Why don't you tell me?
Julian: Well it's certainly tasty for someone. *giggles and cuddles up to kiss Rori's neck*
Jason: *pauses from wringing his shirt out* O_e ... the fuck?
Rori: Oh Jason don't be so modest. *pulls his shirt off to reveal a moist, leanly sculpted physique beneath smooth caramel skin*
Jason: HEY!

[13] Artemis: *snaps a picture of Jason* Um, I mean... Yousawnothing. "I'm going off track a little." Tee hee, noooo... "So. Um. How many people have seen you bare-ass nekkid?"

Jason: Too. Goddamn. Many. *shoots Rori a pointed glare and yanks his shirt out of his hands*
Rori: I dare not count, but if you'd like a glimpse... *gets ready to strip some more*
Julian: *giggles*

[14] Artemis: "How lovely." I know, rite!? "Have you ever wanted to smoke crack? Are you a crackhead?" *pauses* ... I don't like this question.

Jason: Pot, yes. Crack, no. I get to deal with enough crack thanks to the people I live with. I am not gonna go out and intentionally ingest more.
Rori: Actually, I did experiment with crack at one point during my younger years, strictly out of curiosity. I didn't find the experience overly enjoyable.
Julian: *hesitates a long moment while casting uncomfortable sidelong glances at the others and fidgeting with his fingers* ... Ehm, well... You see... I was something of a troubled youth...

[15] Artemis: B'aww, it's okay, Jubejube. We still love you. *bounces into his lap and hugs him before consulting the questions* "Are you wondering how many more of these questions you must endure?"

Julian: Just a touch, yes.
Rori: I do hope you realize that I could be spending this time doing something considerably more enjoyable than indulging your curiosity. Like sex. I could be fucking someone right now.
Jason: *facepalm*

[16] Artemis: *still perched in Julian's lap* Ooo, this one should be interesting and naughty! "What's the strangest thing you've ever licked?"

Jason: Uh... *thinks*
Julian: I'm... not quite sure, actually. *ponders this while tapping a finger against his lip* Well, unless a pole used for strip-dancing counts. *tiny, thoughtful frown as he cocks head and cradles chin* Or maybe the dildo attached to that sex machine...
Jason: *train of thought officially derails and crashes off a cliff while he stares speechlessly at Julian* O_e;
Rori: Darling, I don't think you want to know.
Artemis: But, but... *blinks big Puss In Boots eyes*
Rori: T_T; ... I really don't think you want to know.
Artemis: *jacks up the intensity of her Puss In Boots eyes tenfold*
Rori: ...
Jason: Oh! I licked the neck of Luke's guitar once while we were on stage.
Rori: *smirks* You've also licked my- *gets pounced on by Jason to make him shut up*
Artemis: But, but... He didn't answer the question yet. *gets her head patted by Julian*

[17] Artemis: *siiiiigh- notices next question* "How many people have you confided in about your contamination with SuperAIDS?" *epic dun dunDUUUUNNNN gasp* D8 Rori! How could you!?

Jason and Julian: *both turn to pin Rori in place with their stares* T_T...
Rori: *clueless* ... What? Why are you both looking at me like that?!

[18] Artemis: "There is no question 18." O_o... Okay! :D

Jason: Al-righty then. *looks back to Rori*
Julian: Now what's all this nonsense about being contaminated with SuperAIDS? *raises brow*
Jason: Man you get me sick with that shit and I swear to god I'm gonna irradiate your goddamn heart in the fuckin' microwave.
Rori: I swear I don't know what they're talking about!

[19] Artemis: "Have you ever considered a fetish?" Oooo, do tell! *eagerly pays attention with her pencil poised over her notepad*c:

Rori: Several, in fact.
Jason: Not the least of which being your affinity for molesting people while they're wet, right?
Rori: Indeed. *smiiiiirk*
Julian: Mm... Well, I will rather sheepishly admit that I have a certain... fondness, for attire that is, perhaps, not entirely gender-appropriate.
Jason: In other words: Ju likes cross-dressing. *Julian blushes and bows his head in shyness* Scary thing is, put him in a dress, give him tits, and add a little make-up, and you'd never even realize he's a guy.

[20] Artemis: It's just 'cause he's oh-so bootiful. (Rori: Amen to that. *gets smacked*) "This mindless torture is over. Does this make you shit your pants in glee?" *stare* ... Ew. It'd better not 'cause I'm not cleaning up after you guys.

Jason: FINALLY. *shoves himself up from his chair and walks out of room*
Rori: Not to say that it was either tedious or particularly impossible to enjoy, but there are better things that I could have done with this time. *turns a toothy grin to Julian and waggles his brows* That mentioning of your little fetish has sparked my imagination, love. What say you and I turn in for the evening and participate in some lovely new experiments?
Julian: Darling, you and I will turn in for the evening for some experimentation once you've explained to me the basis for that SuperAIDS question and whether or not you may have, at any point, picked up something other than a loose piece of ass for the night. *neatly picks himself up and leaves*
Rori: *speechlessly gawks* B-but, Julian...! Wait. Just... Julian wait just a moment I'll explain everything and anything you want-! *rushes out of room after him*

Artemis: o_o ... *looks down at questions, shuffles through the pages, then glances over at the video camera set up nearby* ... 3 *leaves the papers on her chair, picks up her gear, and moseys off humming "Boys On Film"*

*lights go out*

*glinting crimson eyes slowly rise up over the back of the chair; a flame sparks to life, drops down onto the papers, and they are engulfed in fire*

?: Muwa haha. Muwa hahahahaha! Burn, baby,burn! *jolts back into awareness of surroundings, shiftily glances about to make sure no one's watching, and stealthily scampers off into the dark*

-x- FIN -x-