Chapter 2: The Devil Pays Rent

I awoke to the smell of fresh blueberry pancakes.

At first, I was convinced I was dreaming, what with devils, angels, me, and all that other crazy stuff. And now, blueberry pancakes, which I hadn't had since moving out of Gertrude's. I frowned sleepily, picturing Trish's sunny face at the breakfast table.

However, when I opened my eyes, I was met with Emi's hostile expression instead.

I reeled back, coughing and sputtering. "Jesus," I gasped, which immediately caused her to whip around and glare at me.

"Gosh," I corrected. Emi relaxed her tense shoulders, just a bit. I shook my head. "Did you have to be so close to me?"

She rolled her eyes. "I knew you were awake. You were just trying to hide from reality."

"Can you blame me?" I muttered, pushing myself to an upright position and swinging my legs off the bed. I was wearing what I had been yesterday, and a quick glance in my mirror told me that being scared out of your fucking mind didn't really do wonders for your complexion. Then my eyes widened. "What time is it?"

"7:30."

"Oh shit!" I barged into my bathroom and started simultaneously brushing my hair and my teeth. "I'm going to be late for work," I managed to say around my toothbrush.

Rax poked his head through the door. "You've just found out the nature of your existence, and you're worried about being late for work?"

"Running from reality," Emi said, with a knowing nod.

I rolled my eyes as I tried to wipe my face and spit out toothpaste at the same time. "I'm not running. I'm just…postponing. You can wait until after I get off work to blow my mind. Again."

Rax gave an easy laugh. "Okay. We have blueberry pancakes for breakfast." He disappeared downstairs again, with Emi on his heel. I took a momentary deep breath, staring into my sink. I still can't believe this is happening.

Thoughts were racing faster than a train, leaping from one to another, creating a network in my mind's eye. That was how I always approached things, from feelings to programming. Why should this be any different?

I didn't want to believe Rax, but I didn't seem to have much of a choice after the whole train thing, not to mention the angel. I clenched my fists and unclenched it, staring at my hand and wondering how I never knew there was something different about me. Close inspection of my light brown eyes betrayed no hellfire. How could they prove it to me?

And that was another thing. They didn't seem to be much interested in informing me, but they were extremely vested in keeping me alive. The Devil, wanting to save my life? Didn't that inherently say something about me? I frowned and reminded myself that I had never done anything wrong, and that my nature also meant I was as heavenly as I was demonic.

A crash came from downstairs, the sound of pots hitting the wooden floor and lots of creative cursing. I cringed at the thought of seven demons running around my small apartment, but I didn't feel like apprehending them. Wouldn't that be death, anyways?

Blinking rapidly, I suddenly realized that they couldn't kill me. They couldn't hurt me if their motive was to keep me alive. An irrational grin spread itself across my face, and the still lingering fear dissipated, leaving only a slight uneasiness. I shook out my hair.

It took me a record six minutes to finish changing and applying makeup, and then I rushed downstairs. Rax gestured to a stack of three pancakes still waiting for me. I stuffed half of the first one in my mouth, forcing myself to not pay attention to the fucking seven sins incarnate, lounging around my living room and poking at my TV. Gus and Sloth were still eating, and Rax sat in a chair, looking relaxed and at home. Thankfully, I didn't see any huge disasters amidst my tiny kitchen.

I turned to the fridge to get some milk, but when I turned back around my pancakes were gone.

Sloth lazily raised a single finger towards Gus, who was already gobbling down my breakfast.

"Asshole," I sighed, taking a swig of milk instead. Gluttony, huh?

"Emi will be your escort this morning," Rax announced. I narrowed my eyes.

"Thanks for asking my opinion," I retorted, picking up my laptop case. "I don't even think Emi likes me."

"I don't like anyone," she growled, appearing from the corner and grabbing an apple off the counter.

"How cool are you?" I muttered, following her out the door and slipping on my painful heels. As much as Emi and I inherently did not get along, I was nonetheless mildly grateful for her presence, if only because it meant I could ask questions and not get carried away by people who wanted to execute me.

"So," I tried to start the conversation, tripping a little in my haste to catch up. The girl (demon?) walked fast for someone so short. I hadn't really noticed it earlier, but at most Emi was 5'1". "Care to explain any more stuff to me?"

"Thought you wanted to wait until after work," was her brief reply as she slid into the subway compartment.

"I didn't know you were coming with me. Since we have time, we might as well talk, right?"

"No, not really."

I sighed. "Please?"

She huffed, turning her head away so I was unable to see her face. "What do you want?"

"Why are you guys protecting me?"

"Satan's orders."

"But why?"

She turned back now, looking irritated. "I don't know. But when he asks for something, I generally comply."

"Does Rax know?"

"Probably," she spat, sounding a little harsher. "Daddy's favorite. Just because he's Satan's actual son. Special treatment."

"I don't understand how that whole thing works. Did he like, birth all of you guys?"

She crinkled her nose. "Dude, I don't know how he gives birth. I don't think normal rules apply. But as for me and the other Sins, we used to be angels."

I almost choked. "What?"

She rolled her eyes. "You know the story, right? Lucifer used to be an archangel, got banished, blahblahblah. That's Satan- it's his new name."

"Yeah…"

"And all the angels who went with him became demons."

I was silent for a moment. "So you guys used to be good?"

She shook her head with contempt. "Good, bad. I hate it when humans separate us like that."

"Well, it's true, isn't it?" I asked, quietly. "Everything bad in the world comes from you guys. You know. Pride, greed, wrath, sloth. They're all destructive qualities."

She blinked for a second and did not say a word. Then her eyes took on a steely tone and she looked absolutely furious. "Everything bad in the world comes from us?"

I cringed. "I just meant-"

"You meant exactly what you said," she spat, whirling on me. "You're so stupid. Nothing bad in the world comes from us. It comes from you. It comes from humans. Are you really so blind to believe that we have any real impact on your life? We exist to pass judgment after your death. How could we do that if we had a hand in what happens while you live?"

I guess I hadn't really thought about it.

"Everything selfish and disgusting and cruel in the world," she ranted on, "comes from you. All of you. Humans make their own choices. You don't get to blame us for the things you have done."

She was shaking now. People were starting to stare, a little uncomfortably.

"And you're all so ungrateful." Her voice had dropped to a whisper. "You have so many chances in this life not to be a horrible person. Yet you all choose the wrong path, over and over and over again. Sin isn't even in your blood. I can't help who I am. This is my nature. But you all have a choice, and it astonishes me how many times you can be wrong."

"You're jealous," I realized. I couldn't even find a response to the rest. "You wish you could choose."

She barked out a bitter, short laugh. "Honey, Envy is literally my name."

---

Exhaustion was clouding my mind as I stepped outside of the office building. Programming usually came easy to me, like doing a set of simple math problems with a couple tougher ones in between. But today, my mind was so scrambled that I could hardly punch in a line of code without forgetting something dumb.

I almost didn't jump when Percival stepped in front of me from the shadows. Almost. But to my credit, at least I didn't scream.

He was giving me a haughty look that kind of pissed me off without him even saying anything. I felt my blood boiling, and briefly wondered if that was because of my devil genes.

He silently turned and I followed sheepishly, back onto the subway.

Somehow, I didn't think I would be making friends with this guy.

He was quiet most of the way back. He was intimidating, even dressed in regular clothes. His hair was dark, matched to the color of his thick brows and impenetrable eyes. His cheekbones were high and hollow, and he was so tall that I felt like an ant next to him.

I finally mustered up the courage to ask a question about two stops away from home. "Being half devil doesn't make me evil by nature, does it?"

"Does being half angel make you heavenly by nature?"

"I'm asking you."

He shrugged. "No one in your world is without sin, Fae. Emi was right this morning when she said that humans have a choice. You've been raised as one. The angel in you is just as strong as the devil. Which means you have a choice. Every day. Every time there is a choice is be made."

I sighed. "So I'm indecisive by nature."

He shrugged again. The way he did it suggested any questions I asked were trivial and not really worthy of his attention. It made me bristle. "That is why the contradicting forces would have torn you apart, had your powers not been muted."

"How did you know what Emi said this morning?"

He waved a hand. "We can all hear each other."

I felt my eyes widening stupidly. "You can?"

"Of course. We may have to cut off the link soon though, to conserve power."

We were silent for another stop. And then he spoke again.

"Emi didn't mean to be rude. Well, actually, she probably did. But my point is that you are simply ignorant, and you don't see the bigger picture here."

I tried to pay no attention to his condescending emphasis on 'ignorant'. "Which is?"

"The world you live in is not black and white. There is not a simple way to say good or bad. Good people commit sins. Bad people can do good things. If you base your standards around Heaven and Hell, then you're all eternally damned."

"Tell me something I don't know," I muttered under my breath. Ignorant, my ass.

---

I counted backwards from one hundred, as I lay eagle-spread on my bed.

Rax stood next to me quietly. "Are you okay?" He finally asked, after a while.

I took a deep breath and tried not to flip out. "Let's see. I am out of hot water. My house is utterly ruined. I have got six other demons downstairs doing who knows what- and you know, at this point, I don't even think it's possible for things to get worse. I'm starving, but since you guys broke my stove and ate everything that doesn't have to be cooked, I don't think I'm gonna be having dinner tonight. Am I okay? Absolutely."

He chuckled, and I felt my irritation increase exponentially. "Did you hear me? Does this seem fucking funny to you?"

His chuckles turned to laughter. I shot up, glaring at his hunched over figure, his eyes crinkled with mirth. "I will slap you!" I shouted. "I swear I will kill all of you!"

He straightened and tried to stop laughing. "Take it easy, Fae. I know you're mad, and I'm sorry, but it's not our fault. You know what we are."

I grinded my teeth. "You are totally asking for this."

With that, I flung my pillow at him, too angry to hesitate at the thought of tangling with Wrath himself.

To my surprise, he remained perfectly calm, catching the pillow lightly before setting it down and gripping my wrist. At my surprised look, he simply sighed and said, "Look, I know all about angry. All I'm saying is there's no point in it right now. We have a job to do and that's why we're here. Come on. I'll take you to the convenience store. Then you can have a talk with them."

Reluctantly, I let him drag me to 7-11 and buy me some donuts before confronting the little devils in my living room.

Emi and Lucy were playing some sort of crazy high-speed catch with my computer mouse. I had to take a deep shuddering breath before snatching it out of the air. My poor baby.

That got everyone's attention. Rax stood behind me, a faint bemused smile on his face. Sloth was asleep on my couch, Gus was moping around my kitchen, Giles was hovering around my favorite books, and Percival was sitting stiffly next to Sloth, the only one who didn't turn his head towards me.

"Okay. Look. Here's the deal." It took a great amount of effort and swallowing to keep my voice firm and calm.

"You can't do this. I know there's something bigger at work here, and that you're trying to protect me and all, but you cannot fuck up my apartment like this."

Emi snickered. "Or what? We'll go to hell?"

I struck her in the shin and ignored her indignant cry, knowing that Rax would back me up if she tried to retaliate. "I will kick you out. Or worse, I'll pray."

She shut up. Everyone else listened attentively.

I took another deep breath. "I swear, you are the biggest bunch of children I've ever met. You have no sense of responsibility, privacy, personal space, or consideration whatsoever. You eat everything and contribute nothing. You even used up all my hot water!"

"We're demons," Lucy drawled, stating the obvious. "Of course we don't."

I waved my arms around. "Well, you're in the human world now, buddy! You live by human rules. And that means no being assholes. And that also means that no touching other people's things, which means not all seven of you can live here."

Giles raised an eyebrow. "Where would you have us go?"

"Preferably back home," I muttered. Then, louder, "I don't know. A hotel, or something. At least five of you have to leave."

Rax spoke up. "We can take turns guarding her."

Emi wrinkled her nose. "Okay, say we do move out. How would we pay for a hotel? You couldn't afford to pay for a room every night until we leave."

"Get a job," I snapped, bitterly.

They stared back in dumbfounded silence.

"I'm serious," I continued, wondering if the idea was far-fetched. "I mean, if you insist on staying here, you're honestly gonna have to abide by the human system. That means making money to survive."

Another moment of silence. Then, Emi turned to Lucy and said, "I'm pretty good at pickpocketing."

"That's not a job!"

She ignored me. "And maybe we could get Sloth to hack into a millionaire's bank account, right?"

"Are you listening? No stealing!"

"Why not?" Giles asked. "It's certainly faster."

"Because that's not a moral thing to do and I won't allow-"

"Plus we wouldn't even have to stoop to human labor," Rax mused.

"No stealing!" I yelped. "And that is final. Human rules, remember? If you steal, you're going to get arrested. And if you get arrested, then you get exposed. And if you get exposed, bad shit will go down. Understand?"

A collective sigh rang throughout the room, with the exception of Percival.

Rax waved everyone off. "What she says is final, seeing as we aren't much educated about the human world. We'll reconvene tomorrow, and start our job searches. To bed."

"And clean up a little," I added, whirling around and stomping upstairs to my room without waiting for a response.

All I could dream about that night was my landlady fainting as she opened my door to view the utter chaos that was my apartment.

---

Side project, but I may continue it if I finish the outline. Review?

-M