Friday October 30, 2015 2:34 PM

So, I haven't really posted on this in a while so… why not a Scotty Story, eh?

Well, I was about 12 or 13 or so, and I was outside goofing around with my pooch, a black Labrador retriever named Bomber. I was trying to teach him some new tricks- by the way he was like 9 in dog years, so don't tell you can't teach an old dog new tricks- and was pretty good headway with him until it came to the last trick…

…

…

The dreaded roll over.

For whatever reason, a thought had planted itself into Bomber's head that he just wasn't gonna roll over. Well, I thought otherwise. I was gonna make him roll over whether he wanted to or not so I began pushing him, trying to make roll over.

Well… I guess I pushed a little too hard in a wrong spot because the nastiest, stankiest, raunchiest fart came bubbling forth from deep within the bowels of that pooch. I mean, it was a nostril burner. I thought I was gonna die! Covering my nose, I ran away from Bomber, wretching and coughing.

I swear Bomber had this "I told you so" look on his face. Haha, jack ass.