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Theories of Attraction

Part 3

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Callen kept up his end of the deal, but true to form, did not give Nadia any warning whatsoever. She was happily lounging around the apartment after a long week the following weekend, when the door creaked open. Only when she heard "Nadia," in an amused voice, did she turn and realized she was, essentially, caught shoving pizza down her throat with her eyes glued to the screen.

"Oh, hi!" she managed to choke as she leapt from her position to grab the remote. Unfortunately she was in the middle of watching the animated film Trolls. While she had no shame, she did not feel at her most ready with a stained white T-shirt and tattered home shorts. She felt the urge to yell at Callen for catching her off guard (the keys were only for EMERGENCIES!) but half of her attempted to salvage whatever dignity she had left.

She ended up standing awkwardly in front of both of them.

"Connie isn't here," she explained, trying to appear calm and collected despite the red she knew was painted on her face. "Should I call her?" She directed the question at Callen because even though she was unfortunately attracted to him, seeing Emery in her perfection would most likely render her mute in her disadvantaged state. She twitched in an attempt to keep her expression neutral and not scowling ferociously at Callen.

"We're here for you," Callen said. She took heart the way he didn't look at her critically but also… she wanted to throw a book at his head for coming by unannounced.

Emery looked confused. "You didn't know we were coming?"

"Callen enjoys surprising me," she said as cheerily as she was able to while planning murderous retribution in her mind.

"Oh."

"Connie mentioned you don't have plans today," Callen said. "We'll wait while you get ready."

"Ready for what?"

"It's a surprise," Callen said, even though Emery looked like she was going to answer. The latter promptly shut her mouth to look at Callen, but Callen was already ushering her to her bedroom.

"Is this what Connie meant this morning when she said to be prepared for the unexpected?" Nadia demanded. Even though she felt outrageously out of place and ready to maim her roommate, she was also uncontrollably curious. Nadia never really made a point to bring his girlfriends around, but now they were going somewhere together? Wild horses couldn't drag her away from this opportunity. "Give me twenty!"

Later Nadia found herself sitting at the back of Callen's car, presentable, and biting her tongue to keep from demanding where they were going.

"So how do you two know each other?" Emery asked from the front seat over the music playing in the car.

Nadia's eyes darted to Callen—well, mostly it was only his side profile that she could see—but when he didn't answer, she heard herself blurt, "I thought he was a burglar," and promptly slapped her forehead.

"She poked me with a broomstick and locked me in her washroom," Callen added languidly.

"You were invading my private space," Nadia said hotly. Their initial encounter was also a sore spot for her, mostly because of the way she overreacted, but also knowing if she had to do it again, she wouldn't change a thing.

"But I know her through Connie," Callen said.

"You mean you only talk to me because of Connie," Nadia grumbled.

He didn't reply and she once again groaned at the discomfort between them. She didn't mean it in a bad way, but she knew Callen thought she was being mean-spirited. Nadia gazed out her window grumpily. No use in defending herself if it was only going to dig them deeper into the awkwardness that was their relationship.

"I always see you two together," Emery said suddenly.

"What do you mean?" Nadia perked up in her seat.

"The coffee shop," Emery said. "I always saw you two talking to each other."

Nadia couldn't see Callen's expression, but she knew it didn't mirror hers: one of disbelief. But then she thought back and realized, well yes, she was at the coffee shop a lot and always found herself speaking to Callen. And she used that word loosely… it was more that Callen found amusement in whatever awkward thing she said and she tried to salvage whatever dignity she had left via word vomit.

"It's because she's expressive," Callen said.

Nadia shot the back of his right ear a look. "Expressive?"

"Yeah. You have a million expressions."

While Nadia digested that piece of obscure information, Callen had parked the car. It wasn't anywhere she was familiar with. Following Callen and Emery's lead, she got out of the car. She caught Emery's eyes, who was surveying her with a neutral expression. Nadia felt the unfamiliar prickling of discomfort, but she still gave a ready smile.

"Where are we?"

"I heard you're interested in stripping."

Nadia could almost swear her heart dropped into her stomach and she was pretty sure her face was that of a gaping fool. "I found out accidentally," Nadia said in a desperate attempt to state her case to the unsmiling face of Callen's beautiful girl, who was a friend. And then Emery's words registered. "I am interested. In a purely academic way."

"I think the best way is to do it yourself," Emery said casually and grabbed her wrist.

"Wait—what?"

Nadia found herself being dragged to one of the doors in the plaza, which she realized was the entrance to a studio. Callen followed a few paces behind them so she couldn't even really glare at him like she wanted to. Or beg for help. She really had no idea what was happening. When she told Callen about her interest, never in her dreams did this scenario play out.

"I'm here to teach you."

"What!" Nadia squawked, and this time managed to yank her arm away from Emery. "I really only had questions," she said, but at the same time, she really was interested… Nadia glanced at Callen who only shrugged. The strange look in his eyes was back, so Nadia hastily turned back to Emery. "I mean, I guess since you're offering," Nadia said with a small laugh.

A small frown was puckering on Emery's face but she still turned around and led them to an empty studio. Nadia briefly wondered how much it was to rent for an hour (and did Emery even talk to anyone coming in?) but she figured she was just a victim (turned opportunist) in this situation, so she decided to play the rest of the day out in happy ignorance.

Soon Nadia was wearing tight shorts with her hair in a ponytail. Callen was sitting at the far end of the room, lounging on a bench on his phone and not paying attention to what was happening at all… she hoped. Emery talked her through the basics of pole dancing and what it entailed, and demonstrated the (allegedly) most basic of movements.

"You work out?" Emery asked casually, eyeing Nadia's form.

Nadia did Pilates and went to the gym regularly, but the endurance required of her was a lot more intense than she anticipated.

"Once in a while," she gasped, struggling to maintain her position. Her core trembled pitifully. She collapsed in defeat to the ground. She gritted her teeth and pulled herself up again.

"Why are you so interested?" Emery asked, casually twirling and swinging herself up on the pole, almost like an afterthought. The ease she moved with… Nadia gaped. "I thought it was weird when Callen asked me."

At that, Nadia snapped out of it. "I didn't mean for him to do that," she said earnestly. "I was only interested in your profession—generally speaking. There's not much about it on the Internet. Do the clubs treat you well?"

"Only if you're hot," Emery said with a smirk.

"But aren't you all?" Nadia couldn't help but ask. She tried to tone down the reverence but figured it was still shining through.

"Sex appeal doesn't necessarily mean you're hot," Emery said. She probably took pity on Nadia because she stopped and looked ready to wrap up.

She learned a lot more than she bargained for, but Nadia still felt resigned as they drew up to the sidelines.

"Thank you so much for your time," Nadia said. The three of them began to head down and Nadia trailed behind down in the stairwell. It almost felt like she was trailing after her parents, especially when Emery reached out to link hands with Callen. The sight of it almost made Nadia stumble, but she forced herself to focus. "Really great tips. I mean, if I ever wanted to pole dance."

Emery looked over her shoulder mischievously. It made her already pretty face lighten. "You can always do a lap dance with it – they can go hand-in-hand." And then she looked at Callen who couldn't help but smirk.

This time Nadia stumbled, and just managed to keep herself from slamming behind Emery as they reached the door.

It was one thing to assume, and another to know. Nadia tried not to visualize the scene, but it was difficult when they were both standing in front of her. A pesky ache began to lodge itself in her chest – an unfortunately growing recurrence – but Nadia ignored it the only way she knew how – through word vomit.

"That makes sense, doesn't it?" Nadia said brightly, purposely gazing around the entrance of the studio once last time. She even waved at the receptionist at the front as she distractedly continued saying, "I'll definitely practice. I mean obviously everyone has someone in mind – not that I'd propose it – but at least I can practice so if I'm ever ready –"

This time she did slam into them – well really Callen's shoulder, because he decided to stop abruptly just as Nadia exited… and because he stopped so abruptly, the door she'd just opened behind her crashed into her back, forcefully pushing her against Callen once more.

"You what?" Callen turned around slowly.

Nadia stared at him in disbelief. "Are you expecting me to say sorry?" Nadia demanded, although the effect was ruined since she was holding onto her nose, which felt like it was throbbing. Callen was lucky she wasn't mad… she only felt woeful since she was pretty sure her face was bright red now. "Ow. Your shoulder isn't exactly cotton candy –"

"You're going to do a lap dance for who?"

The sheer disbelief in his voice made her back turn hot and she realized just what she was saying to them. Well, not that she ever really watched her words, but this was probably something she could have kept to herself. Not that she should even feel embarrassed, but she did, because he had the professional act, so the thought of an amateur was probably grossly unappealing… not he knew she had him in mind to begin with.

Nadia felt like her face was going to explode.

"No one," she said hastily, side stepping him quickly and power walked to the car. "No one at all!"

X

Nadia figured by this point she should be used to feeling awkward around Callen, but she somehow managed to continue to amaze herself with the levels she was capable of. Ever since the pole-dancing lesson, she knew Callen was judging her. (Although, why would he even judge her when he was the one with the not-girlfriend stripper? Everyone had to start somewhere.) He was a lot more inquisitive than usual, breaching their tacit agreement of allowing awkward conversation(s) to die with Nadia in silence. Instead, he powered through them.

Today, for example, he managed to walk in on her as she stomped around the apartment in an obvious frenzy. She was cranky, her body was sore and she was PMSing. She'd just come out of the shower when she realized her predicament.

"Are you okay?" Callen raised an eyebrow, dropping his bag near the door and shutting it closed behind him.

"I'm actually not," she said tartly. She rummaged through the living room drawer, even when she knew it was futile. She must've looked like quite a sight: hair dripping wet and her clothes were plastered to her body. She hardly dried herself off before she went on her rampage. She ignored the usual amusement touching his face at the sight of her.

"…I'm not sure if you did it on purpose, but your shirt is on backwards."

Nadia paused only long enough to gaze down at her shirt unhappily, but didn't bother to rectify her situation.

"I'm bleeding," she exclaimed in frustration.

Suddenly Callen was near her, looking at her seriously. The amusement had vanished. "Bleeding where?" He gave a onceover, didn't see anything, but was looking at her so expectantly that she paused in surprise. His hand was on her shoulder, and looked tense, as if ready to spring into action at a moment's notice.

Nadia pulled back only slightly. "Oh, I…" She clamped her mouth when her eyes locked with his. She couldn't remember a time when he was this close, and up close his face was even more startling in its beauty. It was a cliché thought, especially in a moment like this. How many books did she read about how the main character was struck to silence when they were overwhelmed by the male's look? How many times did she roll her eyes when they described how the energy would change between them in that moment? It was an exaggeration, far from reality.

Theoretically speaking, it was meant to be a moment of sexual tension and realizations…

"I'm on my period," she ended up blurting, the piercing truth, knocking time back into the moment.

…Instead, it was a more realistic—and unfortunate—moment.

"Oh." His eyebrows were still furrowed, and she felt an uneasy feeling sweep through, unlike her usual obvious inelegance around Callen. "Did you need me to get something for you? I don't mind."

Nadia gaped before she realized she actually had to say something. "Oh, uh, I'm actually out of pads…"

He nodded. "Okay, which brand?"

She rattled off her trusty brand and watched him disappear out the door. For a moment she stood there taking it in, until she decided she was already in a state as it was and didn't need anything else to add mental pressure. Callen was back in 20 minutes with a plastic bag, and she leapt as soon as he brandished the treasure.

"Thanks!" she called over her shoulder as she rushed to the washroom.

When she emerged, he was lounging on the couch as per usual.

"Thanks again," she said in relief. "How much do I owe you?"

Callen gave her a look, and said, "Connie told me you liked Fudge cookies and coconut water. They're in the bag."

Nadia could only blink in surprise, but not one to let an opportunity pass her by, she reached for the bag and immediately tore the package of cookies open. "Bless you," she said with feeling, and despite their history, their experience, her misgivings, for the first time Nadia sunk next to him willingly in a companionable mood. Food always put her in a good mood. "You have no idea how much I was craving this," she told him.

Callen glanced at her from the corner of his eyes, but Nadia, propelled by her high spirits, made herself comfortable. Besides, sometimes she was tired of watching everything that came out of her mouth, of defending everything she said, of watching and waiting for his reaction. Maybe a new rule she can implement is if he was in her home, it didn't count – she can say anything she wanted and it wouldn't exist outside this bubble.

"Wow, you're really going for those cookies."

Nadia could hardly defend herself at the moment. "It's my favourite." She turned to beam at him, but he was already watching her with a small smile on his face, not the smirk she expected.

The same feeling of unease flickered through her again, only this time she realized it wasn't unease, but instead, a strange swooping sensation in her stomach that made her feel like she'd miss the last step going down the stairs.

She hastily turned away, feeling the top of her cheeks heat.

"Connie isn't here," Nadia said to her lap. She felt his eyes on the side of her face and she willed her face to cool down. If could get away with it, she would've stomped to the kitchen to splash water on her face.

"I know." The words were nonchalant. "She told me."

At that, Nadia looked up with the beginnings of a furrowed eyebrow. "Were you going to go through the fridge again?"

Callen met her eyes with a grin. It was so unlike his usual hot-cold-arrogant-holier-than-thou vibe that she almost felt like she'd stepped into a parallel universe – especially with their last encounter being out of the ordinary with a pole-dancing lesson. Not that she was complaining – his eyes were dancing.

She still cringed at the thought of Callen ever finding out he was the inspiration for her interest. The day she stumbled on Emery's provocative—and nude—photos at Callen's apartment was both embarrassing for her, but propelled her natural curiosity to new peaks. It was a side of human attraction she forgot existed, and was interested in learning more about.

"I like your place," his voice brought her back to the present. "And you have good food."

"I knew it," she said instantly, scowling at him. Callen only laughed and reached for the remote. Shooting him one last look—purely to teach him a lesson—she stood up.

"You don't have to leave, you know," Callen said.

Nadia gave a pointed look at his outstretched legs that blocked her way, and stepped over him. "It's my home, Callen, of course I know that." She shook her head at the familiar smirk on his face. "I have to get ready."

"For what?"

"I have a date," she said distractedly as she reached into the bag around her wrist for the coconut water. "He's picking me up in an hour."

There was a brief moment of silence, before she heard the television go on. "I didn't know you were dating someone," he said casually.

Nadia took a swig of the coconut water and turned to face him. Callen's face appeared relaxed and focused on the screen, if not for the tension she noticed in his neck. "It's our first date," Nadia said. "Technically I mean."

Callen looked at her then. "What do you mean 'technically'?"

For all her talk of open-mindedness and other incredibly truly embarrassing moments around Callen, this was a different kind of self-consciousness for her.

"It means we've, um, seen each other before." Nadia cleared her throat, hoping he understood, knowing he did. "But that was a while ago. We did a few reports together this semester and…" she trailed off, unsure if she should continue because did Callen even care about her dating life? Probably not.

"I see." His face was expressionless as he turned back to the screen. Nadia eyed the tension in his neck and noticed his tight jaw. "Don't mind me."

The room suddenly felt cold. Nadia nodded, muttered another thanks and turned her heel. Confusion followed her, but all she could think about was his unsmiling eyes.

Unfortunately with less than an hour to spare, she hastily blow dried her hair and fixed her long tresses into a casual tousle, put on light make up, and slipped into a snug navy knit dress that she thought contrasted nicely with her olive complexion. The date was casual, so she grabbed her jean jacket and slipped on a pair of heels.

Callen was still in the living room, but the television was off and he looked ready to leave. He stalled mid-step when she stepped into view, and Nadia felt herself freeze at his sudden attention.

The silence between them felt pronounced, and she watched his gaze drop down her length and slowly lift before their eyes locked. Nadia was beginning to feel lightheaded, and she realized it was because she was holding her breath, but Callen always had the ability to make her breathless, so really, what was new.

Her home was a bubble, she reminded herself. Besides, Callen had Emery, so nothing beyond that reality existed.

Nadia forced herself to smile to hide her nerves, and strut to him with practiced ease. "Don't look so surprised," she heard herself croak through a dry mouth, stopping in front of him. It was hard not to look into his eyes, but couldn't really look directly into his gaze this close, not when he wasn't smiling. "I can be attractive when I put my mind to it."

There was a beat of silence, and then in a low voice, "I never said you weren't attractive."

Nadia's eyebrows shot to her forehead and she opened her mouth—

"What is this?" Connie's voice pierced the moment, with varying degrees of confusion, delight, and a great deal of interest.

Nadia instantly catapulted to the side, and saw her best friend with a bag of take out in her hands and keys in the other… her face, also, looked a little too interested.

"Nothing!" Nadia said, a little too quickly for her taste. "I'm going on a date."

"A date?" Her eyes shot to Callen behind her. Nadia cringed at Connie's presumptiveness. "With—?"

"With Mat! You know Mat." Nadia's voice bordered on desperation, and she almost prayed that Mat came knocking at the door at the precise moment because she didn't think she could handle seeing Callen's look of disgust and disbelief at Connie's idea of Nadia and Callen dating.

Connie's eyebrows shot up. "Mat? You mean, Mat from the soccer…?" At Nadia's nods, Connie's face slipped into a speculative stare. "Oh yeah, I remember. I knew you were going on a date, but I didn't know it was with Mat."

Nadia groaned.

And then Callen said from behind her, "What's wrong with Mat?"

"Nothing," Nadia said quickly. "I actually have to go."

"Is Mat picking you up?" Connie said. "I haven't seen him in a while."

"I might tell him to meet me downstairs," Nadia said, and at the rate this was playing out, it would probably be for the better. Connie merely tutted; the mischievous look on her face did not bode well for Nadia. While Connie didn't know about Nadia's unfortunate reactions around Callen, she had a feeling Connie merely chose to overlook some of the instances she witnessed in order to use it as retaliation. After all, Nadia got along with fairly everyone she met – she just so happened to lack the ability to connect with Callen because of her… unfortunate feelings.

"No you are not," Connie corrected. "You look great, by the way, it's been a while since I've seen you in a dress."

Nadia laughed, despite herself. "Thanks, Connie."

Connie's warm smile shifted to a smirk as her eyes shifted over Nadia's head. "Judging by the way Callen can't stop looking at you, I'd say he had similar thoughts."

Nadia froze. "Connie, stop teasing," she said sharply.

Connie laughed and shrugged, but said nothing else. Nadia—and she suspected Callen—watched Connie hum as she made her way towards the kitchen without regard for the awkward silence she left in her wake.

Callen was looking down at her when she turned, an inscrutable expression on his face. "She's not wrong."

"What?"

"She's not wrong—I think you look pretty."

"Oh, er, thanks." At that moment, Nadia felt her phone vibrate and saw Mat calling. She beat a hasty leave, glaring at Connie's amused look, and avoiding Callen's stare all together.

Only when she was in the safety of the elevator did she lean against the wall, groaning out loud. Her face felt like it was on fire, but even when she told herself to calm down, her heart wouldn't stop racing.

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Author's Note: The way 2020 is going, amirite? Who else misses the simpler days of reading fanfics and squealing to yourself in your room?

But truly, I do hope everyone is keeping safe and appropriately quarantining. I've been working from home since mid-March, but it looks like they're starting to talk about going back to work at a lowered capacity in June… Not too sure how I feel about that since I work in the downtown core.

Hope everyone is doing well! Let me know your thoughts – on this chapter, on life… anything, really. : )