1I'm supposed to feel
Bright happiness, blue sadness,
Hot anger, green serenity…
But I can't.
A weight on my chest
Refusing to free them,
To release them from
The dark recesses of my mind.
...
I'm an automaton
That knows how to human:
Laughing at the right times,
Crying in the correct moments,
Speaking when supposed to;
Pretending as cold glass grows around me,
Separating me from the surrounding warmth,
Seeping into my bones until I can feel
Nothing but the dead chill.
...
It's there, they are there;
I know they are.
I can see them, from within my crystal prison,
Like raindrops on a window,
Taunting tears showing a smooth caress,
But I can't touch
Because they are on the other side,
The other side of the divide.
...
I can't feel
But I can suffocate.
The atmosphere covers my mouth
So I can't draw in, I can't scream for help.
No matter how much I inhale,
There isn't enough breath in my lungs,
And there is less and less air
Here in my container.
The only thing that inflates
Is my growing fear:
Fear of the cold,
Fear of the world that spins without me,
Fear of myself, my fate.
Hyperventilating: I fear I am trapped forever.
It makes me lash out
At the growing glass,
Wanting to stop its momentum.
And it breaks into jagged pieces,
Breaking the skin, releasing
The red, angry drops from my body.
I've accomplished nothing:
The clear walls climb higher and higher.
And like sand in an hourglass,
The red fear fills the space.
...
Bang. Bang! BANG!
"Let me out."
BANGBANGBANGBANGBANGBANG!
"Let me out!"
bang.
Before I run out of time.