La Boca

(I was just about to sleep when this idea popped in my head randomly and I thought I'd scribble out a quick one shot to capture it so there may be a Pt. 2 maybe. I got done as much as I'd thought through today lol It's just for fun and supposed to be a bit silly so yeah)

The room was dark, she concentrated hard on the sound of her breathing filling her head, slightly suffocating in an effort to be as silent as possible. He lay on his shoulder, his eyes closed, his frame a dark shadow on the other pillow and she kept her eyes open, unable to look anywhere else, watching the gentle rise of his shoulder with his breath that seemed natural and uninterrupted, very unlike her anxious and racing thoughts.

She placed a hand over her mouth, turning back onto the pillow, her hair fanning out against the white cotton and exhaled hard, focusing instead on the ceiling for a moment to try and catch up with her thoughts. She'd been holding her breath, and she shook her head at herself, "what is wrong with you! just relax!" She squeezed her eyes shut, nodded and took two deep breaths before turning back over, releasing her shoulders and weight completely onto the bed in an effort to be comfortable.

"Can't sleep?"

She jumped, and he chuckled, trying to bite back his amusement as she started to blush with embarassment.

"Um, no-just...well maybe...maybe.." she laughed a little too and turned back over, pushing her hair back from her face and sighing. The ceiling just stared and raised an eyebrow so she made a face at it.

"What is on your mind?" his voice was quiet, more serious and her thoughts quieted too, focusing on the question and already her answer.

"You." she bit her lip. Oops, awkward. She began to turn to her other side when he placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Turn towards me. Let's practice breathing, okay?" His hand withdrew and she wished that it hadn't but turned toward it anyway; helplessly.

"Okay."

She breathed for him, the deep inhale and exhale, in through nose, out through mouth. The first thing he'd ever taught her and instantly she was more relaxed, and yet not so. The pulse in her wrist calming but also quickening and spreading to her throat and belly, hearing his voice beside her becoming more of a distraction than anything else.

She trembled and her breath trembled with her. She knew he could tell and tried to hide it. That's not what it's about, she reminded herself, but sitting there with his words and presence so close, she couldn't help it.

Eventually, she trailed off and silence filled the air around them. He let it continue for a few minutes and maybe she thought of one thousand things to say, but lord knows, she didn't say a single damn thing.

"Something wrong? Why have you stopped the breathing?" His voice was genuinely questioning and she blushed again, he couldn't see it through the darkness, but she could feel it, the tingling that began in her neck spreading to her face.

"I just...am.." she paused. There are hundreds of ways to say certain things to certain people but when it came to him, she seemed to think of all of them and also none. She stammered in her head, tripping over the words she usually grasped with such ease and comfort, creating frustration and an almost acute amount of desire. The need to express them building until it was paralyzing, almost literally. "I don't know."

She wanted to laugh or scream or maybe both and the silence around them changed. She could see his shape nod and the shoulders relax their attention on her, "That's fine. Sleep well then."

"I think I do know," she whispered it before he was done with his sentence and mentally kicked herself. Why did she keep doing this? She sighed again and turned back onto her back, rustling the sheets.

"Yes?" He hadn't moved and was still comfortably reclined a couple feet away, breathing softly, clearing his throat quietly.

"Yes." Again there was a pause and he allowed it. She sank into that silence, her racing thoughts slowing to a face paced jog, every word and question with the same theme and his name sprawled across them. Damn you, brain, she pursed her lips, deciding to state things as simple as they felt. The core. What did she want. Why was she still awake. What was keeping her awake. She already knew the answer.

"It is difficult to sleep beside you like this.." she inhaled, her chest rising and lungs filling with repressed feeling.

"And why is that?" his voice still soft and unreadable.

Now this was more complicated. There were lots of ways, complex, complicated, vague and indifferent ways she could respond. But she wouldn't. She went with honesty, the core, like he had asked her.

"I want to be closer...to you.", she felt a mix of relief and embarassment again. Not as eloquent as she had hoped, and not as elaborate as she was sure he'd prefer, but she shrugged to herself, it was the truth.

"Closer? How?"

She sighed, a bit exasperated already. "Just closer."

"Well... how close?"

She was frustrated now, so soon and her eyes narrowed on him even in the darkness. Her want overrid her frustrations though, so before she could grit her teeth she let out another breath and said, "I'd like to be able to touch you."

That took a lot from her and the silence filled the room again, minutes of agony slipping by as she sunk further into the comforter.

When he finally responded, she jumped again but not enough for him to notice, her frustrated thoughts replaced instantly with eager and needy attention.

"You can touch me...if...you..." he ran a hand through her hair, her fingers reaching out instinctively towards his chest, not even close to touching him, waiting for the words, unsure of what they would be but still completely caught up in them; more and more as she was forced to wait, his breath slowing down, his words trailing off. She could almost feel the thoughts forming in his mind as he considered and discarded them until he was content, and with what sounded like a small smile forming on the side of his mouth, "If it is only...with... this-" his hand reached towards her, his fingers lightly grasping her chin and trailing over her mouth and slightly between her lips.

He pulled away, satisfied with his answer and relaxed back into his place again.

She froze, in complete and utter shock and couldn't tell if she wanted to laugh or hit him. Maybe both, she grumbled, pulling the blanket around her protectively on instinct. Ha! Like she would. She felt the instinct to turn over and just go back to sleep, that would teach him! But still...the desire was a constant pull in her mind, a tidal wave, pushing her down and under towards him, her moonlight; and she'd be punishing herself even more. She didn't want to waste this opportunity, the excitment of it all turning her into a gentle mess of passion and unlocked emotions.

"Okay." She knew more than a few minutes must have passed while she battled inwardly with herself but turned over, removing her thoughts and shifting a bit closer towards him on her shoulders.

They had not kissed before, only the tight hug they had shared when they met, the hand he had on her back when they walked, and the kiss that he grazed across her forehead after seating at dinner that she could barely feel but still sent shivers and blushes across her skin; so his request was daring and intentionally so.

Big old meanie, she narrowed her eyes again and resolved to show him that she could get what she wanted to. She would show him!

(To Be Continued.)