(I'm not fluent in english)


The fall is familiar, for I got hit down so many times. Yet I'm still not used to it. And I never will.

I wont lift my head from your shoulder. You're not allowed to see my tears-devastated face. This time I wont let you try to comfort me and make me believe in wonders that would later be stolen from me anyway.

I'm so tired of being pulled out of the water and then pulled back, drowning again like a sick wreck. I'm in pieces. All that is left from me are tiny bits of a former human being.

What was it like to feel complete and safe, again?

I couldn't feel more insecure right now. Is this the last time? Am I about to be completely ashes? Unable to get together?

Where is the end of this sad game? My, where is my good ending? I must have failed at the halfway stage.

Unrestlessly killed and brought back to life. Thrown around. It won't stop.

What was it like to feel complete and safe, again?

A transitional state. Two extremes. A thin string. One end of it is the vivid acid fear. The other end is the deep and low sorrow.

An unending agony. An internal unstable state. A never-made choice. An unwanted attempt of an alive being. A forever forgotten folk.

What is like to be dead, again?