Notes: A strange short from my jumpdrive. It is a couple years old and I'm not sure what kind of theme spurred it. Creative fiction?


Driving down the road to work, I didn't understand why everyone was mad. Some drivers honked at me, pinned hard on the horn, some of the passengers gave me some birds through their windows, and some rushed past me like I was driving fifteen in the fast lane. Any person would think of a few things in a hurry: My tail light was out, I had a flat, two flats, or I had an offensive license plate that maybe said "F-U US" (which I didn't the last time I checked).

"Is something wrong with Goldie?" So, I pulled over. I waited until it was clear, got out, and gave my golden Hyundai SUV an eyeful inspection. However, I saw nothing wrong, and my situation would irk me with more curiosity. I heard of "road rage", but it seemed to have gone to the deep end of insanity. Was I that detestable?

Then, I heard a siren. A local cop car came and stopped right behind my Hyundai, probably thinking that I was in need of assistance.

"Your license, insurance, proof of registration please?" He stated the usual, and I was perplexed; there was no greeting or any sort of inquiry. I felt a chill as his facial expression hid behind his sunglasses. I complied, and then the officer told me.

"Looks like you need to properly care for your G-Car." He said, and it threw me off guard. It was in my right to ask what that meant.

"A G-Car, meaning, it's a gossip car. Your car is spreading messages to other cars and you need to put it under control."

I had to chortle, having no idea what to say. The officer continued as if what he said was a standard way of life. Magic or the devil's work in the car? I held my forehead, not comprehending; more so, I was aggravated that I would hear such a stupid joke coming from law enforcement.

"Don't get angry in the car, don't mumble about how much you dislike something or someone, and keep it clean in and out. Or else, it'll reflect how you feel."

"What in God's name?! You sound like I'm supposed to pet and feed it."