We the jackasses of the United States, in order to form a quirkier dichotomy, overdevelop justice, ensure domestic collective bargaining (and the MANY wars between employers and employees that happen as a result), provide for stronger gun control, fatten the general welfare like the world's happiest tick, overprotect the perks of liberty to ourselves and our women's MANY out-of-wedlock produce, do ordain and establish this unfairly brief Constitution for the United States of every blue state from California to Vermont to Rhode Island, with special accommodations in order for D.C., Guam, and the U.S. Virgin Islands.