I remember everything from that day, the painful realization, the awful unfolding, the agonizing pain and then of course the numbness.
Never before has the phrase "you never know what you've got till its gone" felt so real to me, and so painfully real at that. Its the little things that become so annoying. I know for a fact that I can never be able to show off my muscles to the ladies by lifting big heavy boxes, or even drive a car. But the little things like being able to type fast, or text with one hand while carrying the mornings coffee in one hand, the little things that no-one else ever stops to think about because well... they have both of their God given arms.
The most painful moment since my accident was waking up in my hospital bed to the awful realization that in fact it was real, and that I really was missing my left arm, from the shoulder down.
In the few days after being released from the hospital, or rather escaping from hell, I was treated like a returning war hero, that suffered my loss as a result of bravery in the field. In some ways I wish I was in the army because they have all kinds of support systems, and plenty of comrades in similar positions, I had all the initial flurry of visitors I found out that people expected me to return back to my normal self, which is kinda hard seeing as I was missing one vital thing... my arm.
And when people realize you're never going to be the same again, they desert you, I lost quite a lot that summer, my arm, my girlfriend, my mates, my family and my job. Hardest of all to loose though was my car, I made the realization of the fact that I now had to rely fully on other people, and was no longer the independent bloke that I used to be./p
One thing that helped me through the difficulty's was the thought that, it could be worse.
Getting strange looks from people when walking down the street has become part of my life now, though only now do I have enough confidence to walk down the street with a smile on my face.
During the months following my loss, I learned to adapt and found ways to get round some of the difficulties which I faced daily, and then the best thing that ever happened to me appeared, Jane, I met her at a Loss of Limbs meeting, and after sharing our own experiences with each other, we discovered that we had both been abandoned by everyone, so soon we became more than friends, and now I can understand fully when people say Everything happens for a reason.