Em looked up from her favorite couch as the ambassador of Espanya walked into her parlor. "I almost didn't believe it when Louise said you had come to visit," she remarked as she raised one of her gloved hands.
Raol took it gently and kissed the back of it before he let go and settled down on a chair at the her feet. She wasn't the only one wearing gloves. In fact, both of them wore heavier clothes because the shorter Autumn this year had been taken over by a longer Winter. Her fireplace roared on the other side of the parlor, but she still had a blanket over her legs.
Despite her teasing tone when greeting him, the Espanyan ambassador said apologetically, "I realized I haven't visited you in a long while. However, if you would allow me to say, we have been seeing each other more at the king's private entertainments."
" 'Tis not the same in my book," Em said.
After nodding in agreement, Raol inquired about how her joints were doing.
"They are actually faring better than last year," she said with a mixture of happiness and incredulity. "However, Winter hasn't really set in yet. The true test of Dr. Rhazes's medicines and my diet changes will come anon."
"Does this mean you would not have to stop going to the king's private entertainments if you wanted to?" the Espanyan ambassador asked.
"I could," Em admitted reluctantly. She didn't like the thought of forcing herself to go if she could use her pains as an excuse to not. Although she was no longer expected to attend under her previous promise to the king to be his chess partner whenever he commanded, he usually pouted the next day or so until the next time she went. His childishness aside, lately Em felt conflicted toward the king. There was the practical yet suspicious part of her that wanted to keep him at arm's length. She now had to contend with the fact that Warwick and the Sveltheim ambassador had joined the ranks of the jealous women at court waiting for any sign of blood in the water to come after her like sharks. The difference between the two men and the women were that the men carried the political power from being the representatives of their countries, whose rulers hated her. She also had to deal with the king's lust for her. He had made it clear with his eyes during the night of her performances for Raol's birthday. There were also his encroaching touches and tender words. The other part of her was the lonely widow that had felt connected to the king ever since he wrote those letters to her during Summer. Em was also increasingly appreciative of his concern for her wellbeing, from her pains to even her relationship with Raol. Then there was his promise of being a better king and man, which he had been upholding for enough time that Em was starting to believe he could change.
Truth versus real truth, Em thought ruefully as she shook her head at Raol's encouragement to continue attending the king's private entertainments if she felt well enough. Which reason is which? "I still want to be cautious," she said. "I already overextended myself performing for your birthday surprise—which I don't regret," she added quickly when the natural gloominess on Raol's face deepened from concern and guilt. "I loved how happy we made you. The effort was worth your reaction. Yet…" She raised her gloved hands. "My efforts did incapacitate me, which is why I stopped going to the king's private entertainments for several days afterward. And now this frost." She nodded to her iced-over lattice windows.
The Espanyan pressed a hand over his heart. "I am touched that you willingly sacrificed your body to give me a small taste of Espanya again," he said with emotion thickening his voice. "Muchas gracias, thank you very much, for that night. It reminded me how I long to retire and be with my Corazon and daughters permanently."
Em swallowed the lump in her throat which his words had created. "Don't say that," she said in a delicate voice. "You'll make me cry at the thought of you leaving me."
"That will not happen of a while," Raol reassured her. "You are like a daughter, Pequenya. I would like to see you married off before I leave, so that I can be reassured that you will do fine, si? Yes?" He watched a dark cloud passed over her face. "Que-es? What is it?"
Em lowered her eyes to her gloved hands, lying on her lap. Then she told him about her encounter with the ambassador of Sveltheim a week ago and learning of Sigmund becoming a father. She also mentioned her warning to the other dignitary about how Sveltheim should be wary of Brittania. She withheld the part of the destructive aftermath in her apartments because she didn't want to feed into his earlier idea of her becoming the king's mistress. Em could only imagine his reaction to learn about how the king comforted her. She also didn't want him learning about the other reason why she was incapacitated for several days.
"Ah, I noticed your melancholy disposition as of late," Raol surmised. "Is this why you have been also leaving the king's private entertainments earlier when you returned to us?"
Em sighed deeply even as she blinked back her encroaching tears. " 'Tis hard to play the king's fool when you don't feel like it," she admitted. "And I hate being made a king's fool again, but as you have said, he likes my company. It doesn't help that I beat him mercilessly in chess."
The ambassador nodded before he said, "I approve of your effort to drive a wedge between Ambassadors Fanatisk and Warwick. 'Tis true that Brittania under King Edward is not to be trusted, what with the country's proclivity toward expansionism—as even this recent failed attempt at marrying King Edward to Princess Cara of Albania showed—and King Edward's growing zealotry for the New Religion. Sveltheim should stick to increasing its trade with other countries. They have isolated themselves from the lower Iyeropean countries for so long, which is both their blessing and curse. They do not know who the real enemies are."
When Em continued to stare silently at her lap, Raol rose from his chair to take a seat gingerly on the edge of her couch next to her hips. She jerked her head up in surprise, especially when he reached over to lay his hand on top of her folded ones. He could see the glassy surface of her dark brown eyes better now. "Pequenya," he said soothingly, "I know 'tis difficult for you to learn about Count Laggersdotter's child. I understand. That could have been your child."
Em let out a shuddering breath as she squeezed her eyes tightly. Her tears slid down her face. That had been her first thought when she heard the news, but then the real truth hit her. Perhaps she wouldn't have been able to conceive even if she had been able to marry Sigmund because of what happened when she had the plague. Both their blessing and curse, is what Raol just said about Sveltheim, but those words could easily have applied to the current situation for Em and Sigmund. Sigmund would soon be blessed with a child, and she was cursed to be alone. When her tears stopped, and her breathing calmed down, she slipped one of her hands out from underneath Raol's to wipe away the wetness from her face. Then, she opened her eyes to see that sorrow deepened the natural melancholy of the Espanyan's face. "I just want him to be happy," Em whispered. "He was forced to marry under duress, but I hope with this child, he can at least be happy."
Raol nodded. He took his hand back. "Life finds a way," he said. "Love finds a way. As painful as losing Count Laggersdotter was, what you shared together showed that your heart is ready to love again." A ghost of a smile flitted through his mustache and beard. "My hope is to see you married off well before I return to Espanya for the last time, si? Yes?"
Em used all her willpower to force herself to smile. "Amen," she murmured.
MMMMMM
That evening, after supper, Em went to another of the king's private entertainments. After excusing Raol's absence for needing to do ambassadorial work before the Noctum mass, she straightened up from her curtsey at the king's signal. Her dark brown eyes swept over the room.
Odessa played host to the card table, as usual, stuck between her current lover and her ex-lover. This sight had become increasingly familiar now that the king was allowing Baron Riordan to join the private entertainments. When Em questioned him one time about this decision, the king admitted that the invitation was suggested by none other than the Duc d'Saud, who wanted it as a white flag of sorts to Odessa. Despite the idea coming from the king's cousin, none of the three in the vexing love triangle really looked happy about the arrangement. Although Em was concerned, she figured her best friend could manage the situation. So far, the Duc d'Saud hadn't said a peep about cuckolding Baron Riordan with Odessa at the end of Spring, which was driving the Brittanian mad with worry and suspicion. Knowing that her ex-lover was the one to ask the king to include her current lover in the private entertainments further fed into her paranoia that he was trying to set her up. It didn't calm her at all that the Duc d'Saud had been nothing but chivalric and amiable to her since she returned to the island capitol during Summer. In addition, his good will hadn't extended to Baron Riordan, and the latter knew it. However, Baron Riordan had decided to stand up for himself now that he was confident that Odessa did not plan on going back to the king's cousin.
At the other end of the card table were Peter and Adelle, working as a team to play because Peter thought it'd be amusing to teach his wife card games. She, in turn, curbed his gambling excesses due to her frugal nature and her aversion to looking like a losing fool in front of the others. Sitting on one of the few couches in the private chamber were the last couple, Louis and Bessie. Her stomach was finally showing what grew underneath in a small bump, which her proud betrothed was rubbing along with her. In addition, her gown hung loose to accommodate her growing bosom, and her round face had taken on a second chin, which she was very conscious of even thought it didn't stop her from craving strawberries and cream.
"Madame Kraven?" the king called, seeing her staring at her pregnant friend. He noticed that her dark brown eyes were beginning to mist up. She jumped. Red crept up her neck. The king smiled pleasantly as she quickly headed over to the armchair across from him.
As she settled in her armchair, Louis, who had looked up when the king called her, said in exasperation, "Oh, Corbu! Bess here thought she felt the baby move, but I can't feel anything!"
"Probably 'twas passing gas," Leonce muttered. When he saw the glare from Odessa, an embarrassed look crossed his face. "I am sorry," he said quickly. "I was joking."
" 'Twas a crude one," Baron Riordan commented blandly, his eyes on his cards. "There are ladies present."
Leonce's grey eyes narrowed. "I said sorry, didn't I?"
Ignoring that tinder box, Em said over her shoulder to the king's youngest companion, "The timing is too soon. You know, you should speak to Ambassador Espicreto. His wife had three children. He has such hilarious stories that could enlighten you." In a lowered voice, she muttered to herself, "Or put your sufferings in context."
The king, who heard her last comment, grinned from across the chessboard as he started their first game. "He has children?" he asked of the Espanyan ambassador. He remembered hearing about the daughters during the ambassador's birthday.
Em's smile was a mixture of happiness and sadness. "Two daughters," she said before making her opening move. "They are near marriage age, and with very strong wills, from what he tells me." Sadness overtook her when she added in a more somber voice, "He also had a son who died very young, but God giveth, and God taketh." She crossed herself.
The king stared. So, this is another reason why they are so close. They share the loss of a child. The thought made him freeze. He had no evidence that she had lost her child, but he had a strong feeling that was the case. Why else was her child missing from her life? He didn't see her as a mother who would have been able to part with her child. Unlike mine. The king shook his head before making his next move. Then, his grey-green looked at Madame Kraven's naked hands. They were red, but based on the way she could easily grab at the chess pieces, they were not stiff anymore. Seeing her begin to emotionally and mentally withdraw, he commented on the state of her hands, which elicited a snort from Odessa de la Pole.
"Yes, all is fine for now," she said irritably. "However, Em insists on still helping make Bessie's baby clothes, even though we told her that she could let us do it."
"Odessa," Em said in reprimand, but she returned the king's scowl with a blank expression.
"Is this true, Madame Kraven?" he demanded.
"Complain all you want," she retorted. "I will not stop. I will be deathly bored otherwise."
The king shook his head along with Odessa at her card table. He watched Madame Kraven turn her head to her left, realizing Philippe's seat was empty. The king explained as he moved a pawn up, "Philippe excused himself for tonight. He has unfinished work like Ambassador Espicreto, it seems." The king sighed. "We had another council meeting today that ran late. That is why I had everyone sent back to their apartments for luncheon. Hard decisions, eh?"
Em nodded before she had one of her knights leap over the defensive row of pawns he set up. "Poor Monsuyer Bordeaux," she commiserated. "He works hard like a king, with none of the rewards."
The nostrils of the king's aquiline nose flared. "I have been working hard too," he argued before he took her knight with his waiting rook. "Am I not allowed rest?"
Em sighed loudly. "I suppose so," she decided, "but I don't know how me beating you at chess can be considered relaxing." A sly smile flitted across her lips.
The king narrowed his grey-green eyes even as his own lips resisted the grin trying to stretch them across his face. "We shall see who beats whom tonight, Surnoi. Alle. Hurry. The next move is yours."
"Victory doesn't always come quickly," Em murmured as she had a pawn jump two spaces forward from its starting point. "A thorough victory takes much planning and time to execute."
"Wui," the king said readily. His heart skipped a beat when her dark brown eyes flashed at his face. Yet, he quickly shook off his sudden nerves. Madame Kraven had shown she knew a lot more than she let on, but she didn't know about his agreement with Philippe that ended on New Year. The king said pleasantly, "You know, Ambassador Espicreto mentioned yesterday after you retired early that I should consider attending Noctum mass more. I think that—"
"No," Em said sharply, making the king's hand freeze over the knight piece he was about to pick up. Eyes leaped to her and the king because of her tone, but she ignored them. She knew that Raol was using the king's desire to be around Em in order to bring the king deeper into the Old Religion, but she would not let this new angle of his plan happen. Just like how she wanted Ambassador Fanatisk and Sveltheim to stay neutral in the plots of Warwick and Brittania, she didn't want the king to be pulled into a religious struggle within his own court, with him as its epicenter. Em had seen during King Henry's court what happened when the Old Religion and New Religion adherents warred with each other to influence the Brittanian king. Despite this Frankian king's new drive to become a better ruler, Em didn't believe that he had the cunning or strength like King Henry to keep his court from tearing itself apart. At worst, he would become an unwitting puppet to Raol like Warwick wanted him to be for Brittania and the New Religion.
"Madame Kraven, do you not want my soul to be saved?" The king's tone was teasing, but she could see the hurt darkening his grey eyes.
He is still a child, no matter how hard he's been working on himself lately, Em couldn't help thinking. To placate him, she shook off her blank mask to reveal a sincere expression before she said, "I am sorry for my harsh tone. This talk of you going to Noctum reminds me that I will need to stop going myself now that the weather is starting to cover everything in light snow." When realization brought a guilty look on the king's face, Em said tentatively, "I will need to stop coming to these private entertainments soon in case my body reacts like the previous years during Winter. One flight of stairs to my apartments is easier on me than all three."
The king's eyebrows furrowed. "Do you not have confidence in Dr. Rhazes's treatments?"
Em frowned. What was it with everyone wanting to see her suffer for their selfish reasons? " 'Twill be the first year since I started them. I've suffered for so long that I want to be cautious. Is that not an acceptable explanation?"
He heard the frustration in her tone. "Wui," the king conceded. "Forgive my inconsideration. I'll allow you to pause attendance for my private entertainments. In fact, I noticed that I have been favoring them over the public entertainments since Holy Week. The court appears to be looking bored lately as a result. 'Twill be a welcome change for them to go back to more public entertainments."
And you won't be left alone with Raol outside of my presence if there are less private entertainments, Em thought in relief as she nodded in agreement.
When they resumed their chess game, the king said, "I will order for the braziers to burn again in the Salvator Cathedral during the day time. No padding for the pews, even thought I still like the idea for my backside's sake," he quipped.
Em chuckled. "Please, no padding." Her eyes zeroed in on a relatively empty spot on the chessboard. She took one of her pawns and moved it into the spot in order to reveal her hiding rook. "Checkmate."
The king stuck out his bottom lip in a pout before they leaned forward to put their respective pieces back in place for another game. He admitted, "Now that you'll begin to not come for private entertainments, and I assume you will also not stay for many of the public entertainments, I will see you less like last Winter." When the chessboard was ready, he made his first move. His grey-blue eyes flickered over the blank mask she had put back on. "What say you that after Devotions, I can visit your apartments and play chess there?" he suggested.
His words set off alarm bells in Em's head. In a calm voice, she said, "I happen to be busy at that time between Devotions and Vigil. When I am not soaking my body in the tub during Winter, I am napping." Among other things, but he doesn't need to know what they are…
At the mention of her Winter baths, an image of her naked and wet flitted into the king's mind. Before his imagination could run wild with it, he said teasingly, "You nap like an Espanyan."
A wide smile spread across Em's lips. "Yes, I think the afternoon siesta is a brilliant custom," she said enthusiastically. "You know, whenever I will be inevitably sent out of Frankia, or leave on my own volition, I can always go to my villa in Espanya. 'Twouldn't be hard a transition, really. I already speak, dance, and nap like an Espanyan."
"Non," the king said curtly. He pointed at her face, whose eyes had widened. "You will speak no more about you leaving Frankia. In fact, don't even think of it as even a possibility."
Em's eyes returned to their normal size, but she raised an eyebrow. "Your Highness, are you trying to command what I even think now? That is very kingly yet arrogant of you." A teasing grin stretched her lips when his dark grey eyes narrowed. "Why do kings believe that they have such power to rule how someone thinks in their own mind?"
The king glowered at her. The finger that had pointed at her face now dropped to the chess game. "Go play. 'Tis your turn," he said with annoyance.
Em's grin turned into a smirk when her queen captured the rook piece that she saw he had been aiming to use to check her king from behind her neat row of pawns in front of it. As the king's face morphed into consternation from his plan ruined, Em's dark brown eyes slid to her right side, at the empty chair that was now Raol's but had once been Sigmund's.
The king grudgingly switched tactics and retreated his queen to his side of the board, lest it be captured next. He looked up when it was her turn and saw where her gaze had gone. "Madame Kraven, Ambassador Espicreto is only gone for tonight," he teased, forgetting his earlier irritation at her musings on leaving for Espanya. "You'll be able to hear him wax poetic about another passage of the Codix tomorrow." When her eyes took on a glassy sheen, the king's gut roiled within him. His smile dropped in realization. "Oh," he said flatly. Before he could stop his words, he bit out, "You're remembering your lover."
A soft, incredulous laugh escaped Em's lips even as her heart squeezed at his description of Sigmund. "Kings should really not be in the business of policing people's thoughts, especially when they think they know what the other person is thinking." Her gaze returned to the king's triangular face, whose edges had sharpened. When his eyes turned as hard as steel, Em's lips dipped into a frown. "I was not remembering him in that way," she said quietly, but she confirmed that she had been thinking about Sigmund. Em watched the king's hands curl into fists in his lap. "The last time I saw him, he was an unmarried man with several years of ambassadorship ahead of him. Now, not only is he married, but he is about to have a child. 'Tis my fault that he was forced into his current predicament so soon." She lowered her eyes to her lap. "And what do I have to show for meddling? 'Tis like what Ambassador Fanatisk pointed out: I am still a lonely widow."
The king drew in a sharp breath as rage exploded inside him. In a soft but dangerous tone, he said, "He said that to you?" The knuckles on his fists turned white.
Em leaned forward and lowered her head in order to press her fingertips against her temples. She blinked rapidly to prevent her tears from falling. I said too much, she thought miserably. Why did I tell him that?
"Em?" came Odessa's inquiring voice, attracting everyone's attention first to her and then to the two chess players. "Are you alright, dear?"
"She's concentrating hard," the king said smoothly. He uncurled one fist to wave his hand and dispel the stares. "I am beating her for once." He affected a pleasant smile as he leaned over the chessboard to murmur, "Mon cherie? They are still here." He blinked when she glanced up at him with a wry smile on her lips, hidden by her hands from any curious eyes still watching her silhouette. Her tears were gone, as was the guilt and sadness that had clouded her face.
"I thought you don't like liars?" she whispered. "And here you are lying to my best friend."
A real smile lit up the king's handsome face. He tucked away his simmering anger toward the Sveltheim ambassador for another time. "True, I don't like liars, especially when those lies harm people," he amended. Soft puffs of laughter escaped Madame Kraven's lips. His grey eyes softened as he said gently, "I am very willing to lie for your sake, mon cherie." The laughter stopped. His heart sank when her familiar blank mask slipped over her face.
Em dropped her hands and straightened up in her armchair. Her lips moved to silently mouth, "Don't."
The king sat back in his armchair, his smile turning into a frown. Don't? Don't what? he wanted to shout at the doors which were once again closed to him. Don't lie for you? Don't let me come any closer to you? His hands twitched in his lap with the effort to not grab at his hair and tear it out in frustration. Alternatively, they wanted to reach over the chessboard to grab at her face so he could kiss her until she finally yielded to him.
Em lowered her eyes to the game and said aloud, "I think you are mistaken, Your Highness. I am the one winning this round." To make her point, she reached over to slide her knight in its signature L formation into the middle of a swath of the king's pawns. His own king piece stood behind the pawns. His defensive position had become a trap.
"Checkmate."