Dear Me.

Dear me,

I know life has not been easy.
You have known so much more
loss
than anyone should ever know.
You have had countless goodbyes
that no one should ever have to say.
You were broken down at an age
much too young
by the first man who was supposed to
show you what love looks like.
Sitting on the floor crying with a swollen cheek
where the beer can connected
wondering why he hurt you like that.
That's not what love looks like.
Reading that letter he sent.
The one where he told you
what kind of nothing you would become.
That's not what love looks like.
You will be okay.
It will get better.
The goodbyes will get easier.
You will have more heartbreak.
The boy who made you smile
with his blue eyes,
but told everyone how much of a whore you are
when you never so much as held hands with him.
That's not what love looks like.
The man who wasn't brave enough to
love you.
That's not what love looks like.
The man that won your heart and
made you fall for him
and then told you it was your fault
it didn't work,
told you that you would never
get over your issues surrounding sex
and would never have a relationship
worth a damn.
That's not what love looks like.

It will be okay.
It gets better.
Because one day,
you will meet someone who changes everything.
You will meet a man so perfect for you,
it will scare you to death.
You will meet a man who will hold
every little broken piece of your heart
so gently in his hands
healing it little by little
even though he played no hand in breaking it.
You will meet a man who loves
every little weird thing about you.
You will meet a man who looks
at you like you are the only thing worth looking at.
He will love you.
Completely.
Sincerely.
Deeply.
With every beat of his heart.
He will be older.
He will have a past your dad doesn't like.
He will be a little rough around the edges.
But he will be the greatest love story
you never thought you would get.
He will quiet your storms,
keep you safe in his arms,
trace his fingertips over every
word of every chapter in your story,
and he will stay.
He won't run away.
He won't leave.
He will be the best part of your day
every day
forever.

Dear me,
That is what love looks like.
It's gentle and unassuming.
It's peaceful and kind.
It doesn't hurt you.
It comes in the form of a pair
of hazel eyes that you will forever
get lost in.
It comes in the form of
someone you never saw coming.
Dear me,
I know life has been so hard on you,
but here it is safe to rest your tired heart.
Here it is safe to be you fully and completely.

Dear me,
You found your fairytale.
It's a little unorthodox
and it's far from easy,
but that is what love looks like.
So don't be afraid
to love him like he loves you.