song for an imaginary "brother":

it's funny how i can think back
and remember how much fun we used to have
i used to think we were close
you were like my brother
but as we got older
everything changed
our relationship was strained

we both grew apart
you went your way and i tried to tag along
but then my heart was filled with
a thousand sad songs
and i found out
that i wasn't that strong

in my eyes you grew so popular
everyone looked up to you
i felt so pushed back
left alone in the dark
i started collecting dust
as you kept on shining
and i was trapped
in a world with no hope
sometimes i wonder if you felt the same
way
or is this feeling something i've
made up since those days

did i ever seem like a sister to you?
maybe not, maybe you haven't give it
much thought
i remember how we used to fight
how you made me laugh,
then made me cry
i remeber how you used to scare me
to the point where i couldn't sleep
at night
but it was all in fun
you and i had fun
had is the keyword
'cause now we barely talk
is this feeling something i've made up?

i remember how you said
you'd beat that kid up
when he kept making fun of me
on the school bus
will you still be there to protect me?
especially now that i'm not strong?
maybe not 'cause you don't show it
you didn't show it the day
i got locked up
when i showed something was wrong
you just shrugged and said "that sucks"
i never felt more all alone
more misunderstood
no one understands me
i don't know how they could

everyone's always paying attention to you
we never overshadowed eachother
but now you do
maybe it's really me that changed
maybe it's me that's causing this strain
all i know is that we grew apart

all the memories are saved in my heart
and i know that no matter what
no matter how jealous i ever got
deep down inside i'll always love you
and i cherish the times that we spent
when i thought you were like
my best friend.