A Sappy Tale of Romance
A/N: Merry Christmas, Omniscient! HEHEHEHEHE Here's your romance!
One fine day, a beautiful princess with long, flowing, perfectly curling golden hair was sitting in a bright, beautiful clearing in the majestic woods on the edge of her beloved father's kingdom. The kingdom's name was Perfection. (A/N: Insert me rolling my eyes) Anyway, the princess's name was Princess Angelica. (A/N: Go figure that one out...) She was loved by all the animals because of course she was a perfect angel and she was beautiful to boot. However, she wasn't the usual happy, bubbly princess that everybody knew her to be. Secretly she wished for a tall, handsome prince on a dazzling pure white steed to come and sweep her away in his strong, perfect muscular arms. The only things that knew of her secret wish were all the animals. They decided to help her out as the good kind animals always do in these Sappy Tales of Romance. The Deer leapt about through the suns-plashed, winding trails, searching for the perfect prince. The Bluebirds sang the message for other animals to help them in their quest. The Bushy-Tailed Squirrels scampered from tree to tree, looking down upon the search and the fluffy cute Bunnies (A/N: . Insert gag) stayed behind to comfort the perfect Princess Angelica with their cuteness and their fluffiness.
The deer wandered into another clearing and there they found a heavenly handsome boy, eyes bright blue and head wreathed in golden curls to rival the Princess Angelica's, sitting morosely on a stone, his brilliant white steed in silver and gold mail standing quietly next to him. This was Prince Geoffrey. Everybody in his father's kingdom Ideality loved him dearly. His forest friends, the Wolf Pack and the Red Fox, knew of his secret wish to find the Perfect Princess for him to marry. The Fox's keen sense of smell picked up on the deer and the Wolf Pack circled them. Quickly the Deer told their tale of the Princess Angelica, who's heart lamented over her loneliness. The Wolves then made a plan with the deer to lead Prince Geoffrey to Princess Angelica. The Red Fox told the drop-dead gorgeous (A/N: Insert another gag-reflex from me) Prince to mount his snow-white steed named Trixie (A/N: Insert me rolling my eyes yet again) and ride after the Wolf Pack, for they had found game to hunt. Being the perfect horse for the perfect Prince Geoffrey, as soon as his liege had mounted, he reared up proudly, as all Princes's steeds must in order to make them look perfect and valiant as the pure white steeds do in these Sappy Tales of Romance.
Off they galloped after the Wolf Pack, who were following the Leaping Deer through the sun-splashed winding trails to where the Princess Angelica sat in her absolutely beautiful pink, lacy dress. (A/N: Insert me wrinkling my nose in distaste at the pink lace. Yech!) Trixie's nostrils flared pink against the startlingly pure white of his coat, which was glistening blindingly in the warm glistening sunlight as the Prince spurred him on after the Wolf Pack, who were holding the pretense of hunting the Princess's Leaping Deer who were actually leading them to the lamenting Perfect Princess Angelica. After the wild dash in and out of the graceful trees, they arrived at the clearing where the Princess sat, holding the fluffy, cute Bunnies, wreathed in the warm golden sunlight. The sunlight lit her golden hair to perfection as it always does in these Sappy Tales of Romance. Prince Geoffery's heart thudded painfully as he pulled up Trixie with a snort. The Bluebirds sang praises that the Perfect Prince was found for their Beloved Princess. Princess Angelica looked up mournfully at the white steed's snort and her sorrowful face turned the frown upside-down into a dazzling, pink-lipped smile as she saw her One True Love! (A/N: Insert sarcastic sigh of 'Awwwwwww') Immediately, Prince Geoffrey dismounted and Trixie, being the Prince's noble steed, stood perfectly still in his armor of gold and silver when all he really wanted to do was eat the perfect, green grass beneath his perfectly manicured hooves.
"I have found myself a Beautiful, Perfect Princess for my Bride!" cried the Prince like a dork, sweeping the Princess Angelica off her tuffet like it always is in these Sappy Tales of Romance. "And I have found my One True Love, who just happens to be a strong, handsome Prince who Swept me off my Dainty little feet!" cried the Princess stupidly in return, joy radiating from her perfectly made-up face like heat from the sun. "My Love!" Prince Geoffrey said in a mushy, lovey-dovey voice as he pressed his lips to her plump pink ones. 'MMMPH!' the Princess tried to say back, but couldn't. (A/N: BARF o.O need I say more?) He mounted his perfectly white noble Steed Trixie with the Princess Angelica still in his arms (A/N: I don't know how he did it either...) and off they rode into the sunset because that's how it always happens in these Sappy Tales of Romance.
The End and Good Riddance.
A/N: DO NOT TAKE THIS PATHETIC EXCUSE OF A FICLET SERIOUSLY. IT IS MEANT TO BE FUNNY AND INDUCE VOMITING WHEN YOU ARE SICK OR HAVE INGESTED POISON!
A/N2: Just kidding, CK, this isn't your actual Christmas present! LOLOLOL ^_~