"Now, if you'll look to your right, my left," the tour guide, a man who bore a remarkable likeness to Ben Stein, droned on, his dull gray eyes half-lidded, staring off into space. "You'll behold this exquisite memorial stone from the so-called 'Viking' era that was discovered in the landmass of 'Scandinavia,' present day Sweden. Now, if you will move along we can move onto the so-called 'Aborigine' room and continue in this fascinating discovery of the past. Come along now," he said, not waiting for any replies and turning and dragging himself down the next hallway.

A lethargic crowd followed in his wake, many of the high schoolers sporting CD or MP3 players. Only four students remained behind, three of them to make sure that the fourth didn't mess anything up.

"ARGH!" Eirian Eithne growled, plopping herself down on the cold marble floor dramatically, smooshing her heart shaped face in between her hands. "This is boring. INSANELY boring!" she reiterated, lively gray/steel blue eyes sparking with mischief before falling. "How can you make a museum boring? I mean it's bloody well im-friggin-possible! And yet this stoopey Ben Stein dude has done it! He made the VIKINGS boring, for Frey's sakes! I mean, they were FARMERS who terrorized all of northern coastal Europe AND pretty much everywhere else! They were friggin' AWESOME and this baka craphead made them boring! Imagine! The VIKINGS, BORING! What the frell? And he didn't even tell the Edda Prose right!" she continued, ranting on and on, ignoring the strange looks her friends were giving her. "He's such a stoopey dumbass idiotic baka moron fool of a Took stoopey frelling jerk!" she finished, pounding her fists on the floor for emphasis.

"Stoopey?" Carrey McQuilen, Eirian's tall blonde friend, asked, raising a perfectly formed eyebrow.

"Yeah! He's so stoopey! Grrr... I shall destroy him!" Eirian vowed, shaking her fist in the air.

Ignoring the whole temper-tantrum scene completely, Jay Roberts, another close friend of Eirian's and a smart ass skateboarding "punk" to boot, pointed a sun browned finger at the memorial stone that the tour guide had briefly mentioned and asked, "So what's so important about this dumb rock anyway?"

"Aaaaaaaiiiiiieeeeeee! The memorial stone!" Eirian shrieked, popping up from behind it and emitting a startled yelp from Jay. Pushing his face out of her way and ignoring his glare from the floor, she continued on, swishing her brown-red ponytail behind her shoulders and gesturing wildly, as was common for her, accenting the stone with her hands. "Ya see, this line right here? Yes, yes, well, it depicts the battles that he, the man of the house, took part in, while at the bottom you'll notice these kind of stringy little thingies here? Yes, yes, well, that's the world tree Yggdrasil, the foundation of all life. Now here -"

"Hey! We get it already!" Jay interrupted, jumping up in front of his friend and pushing her tiny form away. "Jesus! We get it! The damned stone is wonderful! And you're a damned genius! God..."

Poking Jay in the forehead with her stubby little white finger, Eirian corrected, "No, it's VUNDERBA, Jay, VUNDERBA. And, actually, Jay, genius is a protective entity of the Greek culture that children are 'born' which and so, technically, we are all/have geniuses. Furthermore," she added, smiling like an airhead and cocking her head to the side, "I don't really know any of the bull I tried to pull about the memorial stone. I assumed everything." Turning her back to his enraged expression and looking at Carrey and Mike, who were waiting expectantly, her grin grew larger. "Now who wants to touch it?"

"Hell no, Eirian!" Mike Klaussen, a boy of Oriental heritage and spiky blue highlighted black hair cried, Carrey shaking her head vehemently in agreement behind him. "LAST time you tried to touch something that we ALL knew that you SHOULDN'T, you broke three porta potties, a pickup truck, coast a company over $60,000 in damage AND we all ended up getting grounded for three months!"

"Hey! That was almost a result of your own faults."

"Yeah..." he agreed dryly, "And while we were trying to get you to stop we all fell off a building and hit a man, breaking BOTH his ankles. You're lucky we didn't get sued!"

"Errrgh..."

"And, if you touch that, then we all know that you will just get into some kind of horrible mess that none of us can even fathom or get you out of, so no." Flicking her head towards Eirian, Carrey shoved Mike forward, yelling, "Get her!"

"Hey, hey, hey!" the sixteen year old troublemaker yelled, dodging out of the two's way and swinging up behind the memorial stone. "Come on, guys, what harm can happen just from touching some dumb old stone anyways?" she asked, picking up a finger and slamming it into the stone, nearly dislocating her finger. "Owww..." she muttered, cluttering it to her chest. "That's hard..." before smiling up at her friends. "See? Nothing!"

It was at that moment that chaos erupted. Of course, none of this should come as a surprise as, well, that's how all of these stories happen and you bloody well know that. Now, red lights began to flash, swinging back and forth, a siren screeching bloody murder, the red playing off the terrorized expressions on Mike, Carrey, and Jay's faces. Abandoning all reason and friendship in a classic moment of panic, the three fled down another hallway, leaving the surprised girl to her doom, as she had decided not to move at all. Vaguely recalling that guards would undoubtedly be coming soon, she ran to a doorway, swerving when she saw a herd of them ramming themselves at her teeny tiny little body. Deciding that spazzing would be far better than gawking, she ran back in the direction she had come in, turning and looking behind her before moving her eyes in the (proper) direction, only to see a large white edged blue-violet portal wrap itself around her and drag her into its arms, closing only seconds before the guards thundered into the room.

Scattering about the room, one or two of the half dozen men branched into the hallways to tread down them a ways and come back; the security guards examined the room, looking for something stolen or perhaps broken. Nothing of the immediate miss came to their eyes, even though they continued to search the room, sniffing for a break-in like hounds after a scent. Finally satisfied, the Head of Security David FiTeille sent one of his men to the control room to shut off the alarm. About to leave the room, a dark green and black rectangular object caught his eye. Leaning down, he picked up the small wallet/coin purse, opening it up to reveal a forced smile framed by auburn hair and lively gray/steel blue eyes.

Opening pupiless eyes, the young woman stared up into the swirling red hued vortex above her, silver accented red hair flowing in and out of her line of sight. A red tipped black winged being swooped overhead, unnoticed by her. The pattern of a continuously moving stream of color captivated her, making her forget what she had just known.

Feeling a pull from her right, she sighed, closing her pupiless eyes momentarily and turning, hair moving unnaturally with her movements. Seeing nothing, she looked down at her arm, wondering how a thread had gotten caught in her forearm before noting the other half dozen strands connected as well. The strings tugged once more and her eyes moved with the motions playing down the string.

This time, a creature stood before her eyes, grand and powerful, energy radiating from its body in waves. The curling blonde hair that bore a likeness to a rolling sea encompassed her shins down, allowing only the tips of her boot clad feet to show through. A simple white dress clothed her curved figure, attracting the eye as the one colorless object in this dimension. Ruby red lips curved in a smile below a long nose crunched at the base while sea blue eyes laughed at the mortal.

"Hilsen," the giantess greeted, waving a hand as well. "I am one of the three Norns, Verdandi, Being. I come on behalf of my sister, Skuld, Necessity, who was delayed and asked for me to speak."

Not really paying attention to the other, the young woman turned to stare at the colors again, asking monotonously, "What of it then?"

"Have you any interest in why you were summoned?"

"No… not really."

Sighing, Verdandi rubbed her temples, once again reminding herself of the problems of mortals. "Then you have no wish to know of your true quest? The real nature of it could be of utmost importance when you face challenges that you cannot readily comprehend."

"No... I really can't say that I care."

"Mortals..." the Norn muttered, still rubbing her temples, before turning back to the digressive (that's for you, Brittney!) young girl. "Then I shall send others in your way to help you later on in your journey. But there is one question that must be answered: What form would you like to take?"

Snapped out of her revelry, the girl turned sharply, eyeing the large woman. "Form?"

"Yes, any form. You may choose whatever you like, whether it be a wolf or raven, giantess or goddess, rainbow or merchant. You can be anything that you wish, such as an undine or elf."

Ears pricking up, the massive Norn finally had the girl's attention. "An Elf?"

"Yes, of course. But there is a minor problem with being a certain TYPE of elf where you're going..."

"Ha hah!" the young woman cried, raising a fist in victory. "I always knew that I was an Elf and here I shall be one! Hahahahaha!"

"Wouldn't you like to know -"

"Hahahah! Never! I shall be an Elf as no other before me! Great and powerful, magical and fierce! I shall have physical and mental prowess and, most of all! Be drop dead gorgeous, baby!" the insane, er, aggressive, girl crowed, pointing a finger at the "sky" for no apparent reason. "Yes, yes, YES! A red braid, vague hints of brown, past my butt but not to the ground! In a perpetual braid it shall be, for I am great and everyone loves me! Hahahah! Eyes like mine with slits that flash. Bow before me or I shall turn you into ash! Silver when I'm angered and maybe a tan too! Hahahah! No one will ever be able to stand up to me, you!"

"Ummm... ^^;;;" Verdandi said, seriously irked by this girl. "Is something wrong with you? Did you hurt your head or something?"

Blinking in confusion, the girl cocked her head at the giantess. "No. Why?"

"Oh..."

"This is how I always act and, because this is absolutely a COMPLETE dream, I can do whatever I want! Ohohohohoh! Now how do I 'wake up' and join the rest of me dream? Aahahahah!"

"Well... You say your name but... I should warn you... This isn't a dream."

"Whatever, Verdandi! Ahahahahahha! Now...

"EIRIAN!"

Disclaimer: (Why put it at the beginning when it looks so beautiful at the end?) I will be putting several things in here that don't belong to me. A fine example is Ben Stein and the Vikings. I may also be using place names, brand names, and etcetera such as McDonalds, Coca Cola, Borders, etcetera. Yes, I do enjoy the use of the word etcetera. Furthermore, several articles of thought in here (i.e. OPINIONS) that are sported as the opinions of the characters, whoever, or myself they are quite badly based on. So please do not take them to mean I attempting to push them upon you; that would be bad for detante. Lol. \^-^/

Moreover, a majority of the characters are based upon myself and other associates whom I have received permission upon. I will also openly broadcast and praise these people for I do think verily highly of them: they are all fantastic personages. So thank you.

Dedicated to: Rock, who is in another state right now and I miss verily. If only we could have written this more TOGETHER, eh? I'll miss ya, Rock.

Author's Note: Well, I wrote this in the summer, about end of May. Sure has taken me a while to post it, eh? I don't even have a name for it! That was supposed to be Rock's job but that haven't seen her since June 5th (she moved and I didn't even know! How bum is THAT?) and she never gave me the name. Poor, lazy Rock. And, believe you me (that sounds so stupid, doesn't it?), I am SO having fun with this! Please don't let the opening fool you: it does get quite a bit stupider and asinine. Oh, and insane, thus being why I dedicated it to Rock. Hopefully, she'll like it. The next installment of "Nameless Compromise With Reality," will be soon, within the week at most but indefinitely before Wednesday. Hopefully, there will be reviews by then. \^-^/ As well, if any of you have time, please visit "Legends No Nihon," another story of mine though it IS verily different than this work. And on my bio there are several outstanding authors/stories that deserve recognition and who I know would be verily pleased to have your reviews. So ja ne, reviewers!

Aku Soku Zan! - Keebler (aka Takatome Ichido) \^-^/