I guess the only way to really describe myself is through my name. I am in fact addicted to stories, and no, I am by no means exaggerating. I can't get to the library often enough (for me), so I just read stories from Fiction Press. I have posted some trivial stuff, but for the most part, I'm just the reader, though I do love to write as well. I am a voracious reader, but I manage to keep track of the plot lines for all of the stories.
Questions I am currently pondering:
What exactly is a 'hopeless romantic' to you?
(Apparently I am. Seriously you have no idea how hopeless I am - and not just for the usual reasons either, though they are a part of it.)
Lots of people are described as funny. I used to think that it was one of the easiest character traits to have... until I realized that I'm not funny. Not really. Cynical and sarcastic and pessimistic as hell though (sorry for the swearing). So... what qualifies someone as funny in your book?
Anybody ever feel addicted to stories at some point? If so, let me know, simply so I know I'm not the only one out there.
Got any good stories here or music to recommend? By all means, PLEASE DO!
Ways to annoy/scare people in an elevator:
1) Announce in a demonic voice: “I must find a more suitable host body.”
2) Apply dripping red paint around the edge of the roof hatch. When someone enters, look upwards and whisper "I think they want in..."
3) Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them. Press the wrong ones.
4) Ask, “did you hear that cable snapping sound?”
5) Bring a camera, take pictures of everybody in the elevator.
6) Call out, “Group hug!” and enforce it.
7) Draw a volleyball on the wall of the elevator and insist you have been trapped in there for 3 months. Formally introduce everyone to the volleyball.
8) Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, “That’s mine!”
9) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
10) Hold the elevator door open and say you’re waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, “Hi John, how’s your day been?”
11) Hum the theme to Jeopardy.
12) Leave a box in a corner, and when someone gets on, ask if they hear something ticking.
13) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
14) Say, while holding a paper with OUT OF ORDER written on it, “I wonder why this was glued on the door when I came in.”
15) Scribble furiously on a notepad while looking at each passenger. When they try to look, hide the pad.
16) Stare at another passenger for a while, then scream “You’re one of THEM!” and cower to the far corner of the elevator.
17) When the elevator doors close, bang on them, screaming let me out!
18) When there’s only one other person on the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and pretend it wasn’t you.
19) When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
20) When the elevator doors close, announce to the others, “It’s okay! Don’t panic, they’ll open again.”
Love me when I least deserve it, It might be when I most need it.
The worst of doing one's duty was that it apparently unfitted one for doing anything else. -- Edith Wharton
Happiness is an imaginary condition, formerly attributed by the living to the dead, now usually attributed by adults to children, and by children to adults.
- Thomas Szasz
People say that life is the thing, but I prefer reading.
-Logan Pearsall Smith (1865 - 1946), Afterthoughts (1931) "Myself"
"People often say that writing is ten percent inspiration and ninety percent persperation. This is nonsense, of course. It's pretty much one hundred percent caffeine." - Caprice Crane, author of "Stupid - and Contagious"
“I’ve been making a list of the things they don’t teach you at school. They don’t teach you how to love somebody. They don’t teach you how to be famous. They don’t teach you how to be rich or how to be poor. They don’t teach you how to walk away from someone you don’t love any longer. They don’t teach you how to know what’s going on in someone else’s mind. They don’t teach you what to say to someone who’s dying. They don’t teach you anything worth knowing.” Neil Gaiman
"If you would give your soul to save someone, give an ounce of blood to keep them from sadness and take your life before you consider living without them, that is not love. It is something more, for love already has a place in the dictionary, it has been defined as: ‘strong affection, warm attachment, to cherish’. By trying to describe it, we have limited its meaning, devalued it. So I shall not say ‘love’ because love is no longer what I feel, it is something more grander, deeper, all consuming, and more profound, but this feeling has no name, and let us not try to name or define it, because I wish not another feeling to be lost to the arrogance of the human race, a species who thinks they can decipher everything, I do not wish this emotion to be lost to a page in a dictionary."
"Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all." Sam Ewig
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Oh, and one last thing, I'm not funny. So instead of entertaining you here, and reeling in your interest, I've just managed to bore you and waste your time. SUCKAS! JK, just kidding, just kidding, don't have a cow! I swear that was just my lame attempt at humor overused by most other profiles!
insert witty nice parting comment of your own preference
So long m'dears,