“my heart broke eleven times before breakfast this morning
and I only stitched it up six times before lunch
first there was your towel hanging next to mine in the bathroom
second was the foresight I had to throw your clothes away so that when I got back from running away from myself, I wouldn’t find you
third was my mother saying she feels like a flower, she blooms in the sun and I cried because I’m her daughter, why do I love darkness so much, I’m her daughter
fourth was the boy I met in the airport calling me and saying meet me in Vienna, let’s drink coffee in an airport and be complete strangers who understand each other completely, meet me in Vienna
fifth was why are you still showing up in my poems
sixth was why are you still showing up in my dreams
seventh was why haven’t you shown up yet
eighth was my sister saying don’t you know how it hurts us to know these things happened to you, don’t you know how it hurts
ninth was hearing my father grind coffee beans, I hadn’t know that I missed him that much
tenth was reading the poem that I wrote last night when I was drunk, too honest, way too honest, stop drinking gin, you are not Hemingway, enough with the gin
eleventh was realizing my heart broke eleven times before breakfast this morning”

-fortesa latifi